Mailisa Lee graduation speech
Item
Title
Mailisa Lee graduation speech
Creator
Mailisa Lee graduation
Relation
Central Valley Southeast Asian Successful Voices
Coverage
Fresno, California
Date
2017
Rights
Copyright has been transferred to Fresno State
Identifier
SCMS_casv_00031
extracted text
>> So I'm Malisa Lee and I give permission for this to be recorded and to be deposited to the Fresno State Archive for
the Successful Southeast Asian Voices. Go ahead and start? OK. Greetings friends, family, faculty, staff, alumni, and
the glass of 2017. Thank you to the Asian-American and Pacific Islander Commencement Celebration committee for
inviting me to speak. It is such an honor to be here. Being here today is incredibly personal for me. I grew up in Fresno,
graduated from Roosevelt High School, took courses at Fresno State, studies for AAP Exams in the old Henry Madden
Library and bowled and played pool in the Student Union. And while I did not get my degree from Fresno State, Fresno
State has always been a part of me and I am here now proud to call it home. When I asked the committee what I should
speak about today I was told to share my journey. So here I go. Like many of you I come from humble beginnings. I
will not talk about how poor we were or what I did not have. What I will tell you is how much I did have. My parents
showered me with unlimited love and support. My parents reminded me to dream bigger than I thought was ever
possible. They pushed me to be anything I wanted to be as long as it was a lawyer a doctor. Just kidding, you know what
I mean. To work hard and to not quit. And for that I am thankful. My family immigrated to the United States as
refugees. I'm the first of my family to be born in the United States. But get this -- I could have been Australian, not
American. After living in Thai refugee camps in the late '70s for several years, my parents decided it was time to seek a
new beginning and apply to immigrate to the United States. My family at the time consisting of my father, my mother,
my brother, uncle and grandmother was denied entrance now once but twice. Why, you may wonder? Well, it was
because my parents included my uncle and my grandmother as a part of their family. Other adults they believe should
apply separately. My father did not want this because there was no guarantee they would be resettled together and he
was concerned he would never see his mother or brother again. See, my family fled persecution in Laos. We lost many
family members along the way including my maternal grandfather who spent months fleeing Laos by hiding in the
jungles before reaching the Mekong River, which is the border between Laos and Thailand. To this day it remains
unclear how he died crossing the Mekong. So the fear of never seeing someone again was very real. After being denied
a second time to the United States, my father decided to apply to immigrate to Australia and was approved. As my
family was preparing for Australia, my father decided to apply to the United States one last time. My father had three
brothers all ready in the United States and they spoke of the endless opportunities available and the freedom citizens
were provided. Our families fought and worked along Americans during the Secret War in Laos. They yearned for the
chance to live in a land of opportunity. During the interview with the UN High Commissioner for Refugees, my father
pled his case once again. And this time with some luck a compassionate caseworker and my father's persistence to
reunite with his family, my father's request was approved. So yes, I was very close to becoming an Australian, but very
proud to be an American. Remember where you come from. The histories and the stories and use it to catapult you
forward. My parent's persistence to not give up on keeping our family together and their courage and tenacity to keep
trying allowed my family to become Americans. Imagine if my father had given up after being denied. I would not be
here today. Growing up in Fresno, my parents were farm workers and reminded us practically everyday that we were
going to college. To take advantage of the education opportunity they found in Laos -- they never had in Laos, and in
turn I began to expect if of myself and of my siblings. I was fortunate my older brother went to college. This was
important. As he opened my eyes to the reality that someone like me, like many of us, didn't only have to dream about
going to college, but that we could actually go. My brother pioneered the pathway to college. As the first of my entire
extended family to go to college, and when I say extended family I mean first cousins, second cousins, and so on. We
simply just call them family. When it was my turn I chose to go to the University of California at Santa Barbara. And
my parents, who were a little hesitant about letting me move away to go to college, supported me on my journey
anyway. They supported me regardless of the cultural pressures signaling them to not let me go. As many of you know,
it was once uncommon for girls to get an education. So the thought of letting me leave home to go to college, it was
uncomfortable. Did I make that sound easy? Well it wasn't. I had to convince my parents why they should let me leave
Fresno to go to college instead of staying locally. I told them I wanted to spread my wings, that they can trust me, and
that I'd be OK. But these were hard conversations to have with a stubborn 18-year-old. My parents were worried and
concerned. And as any parent would be, when their child wants to grow up sometimes a little too fast. I have two little
girls now. And the thought of them moving away to college sounds a little bit scary. Nevertheless, my parents supported
me even though everyone around them had reservations. Their support carried me though my undergraduate, my
masters, and eventually to my doctorate. My parents provided me an environment allowing me to dream, giving me the
opportunity to develop the courage to dream bigger. When I was uncertain my parents encouraged me to try. For every
time I said, "I can't" my parent's asked me "Why not?" For every time I reached a milestone they'd ask me, "What's
next?" As a first born in this country, oftentimes I had to navigate many uncharted territories. I was the first in my
family to get my master's degree, pursue a doctorate, move across the country multiple times, travel abroad, speaking in
file:///C/...lley%20Southeast%20Asian%20Successful%20Voices/Files%20for%20upload/34_Mailisa_Lee_API_Graduation_Speech.clean.txt[3/10/2022 9:08:35 AM]
front of you today, did I mention I kind of have a fear of public speaking? So don't be afraid to be a pioneer. I'm
thankful my brother did. As I'm not sure I would have gone to college and in turn if my four younger siblings would
have to. He made it real for us. Many of you are like my brother, the very first, blazing the trail for your siblings, your
families, and your communities. For that I thank you. While many of you may be the first, it should also be your
mission to make sure you are not the last. So make sure to dream and then dream a little bigger. Be willing to take risk
and understand that you will win some and unfortunately you will also lose some. Learn from your mistakes. We don't
always get everything right the first time so be resilient. Pick yourself back up and try again. Obstacles don't have to
stop you. "If you run into a wall, don't turn around and give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work
around it." It's a quote from Michael Jordan. It was not always easy but it will be worthwhile. Make this moment and
every other moment you have count. Be willing to get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Be willing to try new
things. Growing up I was raised to now draw attention to myself. Speak only if spoken to, do not question authority,
follow the rules and listen closely. While I love this about my upbringing, I realize it also had some drawbacks. I was so
good at not drawing attention to myself that I practically disappeared into the background. This made it difficult for me
as I went to school and to work. My demeanor labeled me as smart but not a leader, nice but not decisive, too kind, too
quiet, and the list goes on. And I don't blame them. I was a quiet leader. And this made it difficult for my professors and
supervisors to see my potential. I had to adjust, unlearn, and relearn, and still continually remind myself that it is OK to
raise my hand, to speak up, and to let my voice be heard. Being up here, this is not easy for me. This is my
uncomfortable. But I am up here because I hope I can share with you a few moments of my journey that hopefully
provide some inspiration to you. For those of you who have no trouble speaking up, good for you. For those who haven't
spoken up more than once in your class this past semester, or past year, I encourage you -- no, I challenge you to speak
up more. You have an important perspective and it won't be heard if you do not speak. I recall the first time I raised my
hand in class. It was my Sociology 125 course. It took me about 40 minutes to get the courage to raise my hand, class
was almost over, and when I was called on my face was red as a candied apple. My body temperature increased by what
felt like 100 degrees and my heart was racing. You may think I'm exaggerating but I'm not. I was scared. But let me tell
you, each moment after this got easier. So remember, take the risk and get uncomfortable. You have an important voice,
you have an important story, and only you can tell it, so let it be heard. For those of you who have all ready figured out
what you are doing after graduation career wise that is, not where you're going to dinner or happy hour, congratulations.
For those of you who are unsure like I was, here's my advice. Don't lose too much sleep over it. Follow your heart.
Remember what made you happy before everyone tried to determine it for you. It is OK for you to throw darts at the
dartboard, trying to figure out what you want to be and what you want to do. As I was getting close to graduating from
college I decided to apply for Teach for America. Since they were known for their amazing work in urban and rural
cities and I felt this is where I could make an impact. I was invited for an interview and during my interview I realized it
wasn't a good fit for me. And Teach for America did too and I was not selected. Of course I was disappointed, a little
hurt, and a little lost. Back to the drawing board I went. Then I picked myself back up and I continued to look at options.
I was living in Washington DC at the time and I considered non-profit work, government jobs, but I applied for graduate
school just in case. I received a handful of denials, which was disheartening. I remember the feeling in the moment,
confused, unsure, and losing hope. And then I was admitted to the University of Southern California. Eventually I found
myself working with student programs and services, and then I began working at admissions, and now helping students
go to college has become my career. It feels less like work but more like a calling. I'm going to paraphrase the words of
the late Steve Jobs during a commencement speech he made over 10 years ago at Stanford. It's one of my favorites.
"You can't connect the dots looking forward. You can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that
the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something, your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever."
This approach has never let me down and has made all the difference in my life. His words ring true to me. Looking
back it makes sense now why things happen they way they did. Why specific things didn't work out and why others did.
But in the moment the road ahead was hazy and in the moment you just have to work hard, not give up, and trust that
everything will work out. Today you are a pioneer paving the way forward for yourself, your families, and your
community. Today you are achieving your dream of getting a college degree and your family's dreams as well.
Remember to surround yourself with a team of cheerleaders to root for you and support you along the way. Make sure
to celebrate each milestone and achievement like today. With that said graduates can you please stand up and look
behind you to see the love and support for you here today. Let's give a round of applause to your cheerleaders. Thank
you family and friends for your love and support. Class of 2017, thank you all so much for having me here with you
today. Congratulations graduates.
file:///C/...lley%20Southeast%20Asian%20Successful%20Voices/Files%20for%20upload/34_Mailisa_Lee_API_Graduation_Speech.clean.txt[3/10/2022 9:08:35 AM]
the Successful Southeast Asian Voices. Go ahead and start? OK. Greetings friends, family, faculty, staff, alumni, and
the glass of 2017. Thank you to the Asian-American and Pacific Islander Commencement Celebration committee for
inviting me to speak. It is such an honor to be here. Being here today is incredibly personal for me. I grew up in Fresno,
graduated from Roosevelt High School, took courses at Fresno State, studies for AAP Exams in the old Henry Madden
Library and bowled and played pool in the Student Union. And while I did not get my degree from Fresno State, Fresno
State has always been a part of me and I am here now proud to call it home. When I asked the committee what I should
speak about today I was told to share my journey. So here I go. Like many of you I come from humble beginnings. I
will not talk about how poor we were or what I did not have. What I will tell you is how much I did have. My parents
showered me with unlimited love and support. My parents reminded me to dream bigger than I thought was ever
possible. They pushed me to be anything I wanted to be as long as it was a lawyer a doctor. Just kidding, you know what
I mean. To work hard and to not quit. And for that I am thankful. My family immigrated to the United States as
refugees. I'm the first of my family to be born in the United States. But get this -- I could have been Australian, not
American. After living in Thai refugee camps in the late '70s for several years, my parents decided it was time to seek a
new beginning and apply to immigrate to the United States. My family at the time consisting of my father, my mother,
my brother, uncle and grandmother was denied entrance now once but twice. Why, you may wonder? Well, it was
because my parents included my uncle and my grandmother as a part of their family. Other adults they believe should
apply separately. My father did not want this because there was no guarantee they would be resettled together and he
was concerned he would never see his mother or brother again. See, my family fled persecution in Laos. We lost many
family members along the way including my maternal grandfather who spent months fleeing Laos by hiding in the
jungles before reaching the Mekong River, which is the border between Laos and Thailand. To this day it remains
unclear how he died crossing the Mekong. So the fear of never seeing someone again was very real. After being denied
a second time to the United States, my father decided to apply to immigrate to Australia and was approved. As my
family was preparing for Australia, my father decided to apply to the United States one last time. My father had three
brothers all ready in the United States and they spoke of the endless opportunities available and the freedom citizens
were provided. Our families fought and worked along Americans during the Secret War in Laos. They yearned for the
chance to live in a land of opportunity. During the interview with the UN High Commissioner for Refugees, my father
pled his case once again. And this time with some luck a compassionate caseworker and my father's persistence to
reunite with his family, my father's request was approved. So yes, I was very close to becoming an Australian, but very
proud to be an American. Remember where you come from. The histories and the stories and use it to catapult you
forward. My parent's persistence to not give up on keeping our family together and their courage and tenacity to keep
trying allowed my family to become Americans. Imagine if my father had given up after being denied. I would not be
here today. Growing up in Fresno, my parents were farm workers and reminded us practically everyday that we were
going to college. To take advantage of the education opportunity they found in Laos -- they never had in Laos, and in
turn I began to expect if of myself and of my siblings. I was fortunate my older brother went to college. This was
important. As he opened my eyes to the reality that someone like me, like many of us, didn't only have to dream about
going to college, but that we could actually go. My brother pioneered the pathway to college. As the first of my entire
extended family to go to college, and when I say extended family I mean first cousins, second cousins, and so on. We
simply just call them family. When it was my turn I chose to go to the University of California at Santa Barbara. And
my parents, who were a little hesitant about letting me move away to go to college, supported me on my journey
anyway. They supported me regardless of the cultural pressures signaling them to not let me go. As many of you know,
it was once uncommon for girls to get an education. So the thought of letting me leave home to go to college, it was
uncomfortable. Did I make that sound easy? Well it wasn't. I had to convince my parents why they should let me leave
Fresno to go to college instead of staying locally. I told them I wanted to spread my wings, that they can trust me, and
that I'd be OK. But these were hard conversations to have with a stubborn 18-year-old. My parents were worried and
concerned. And as any parent would be, when their child wants to grow up sometimes a little too fast. I have two little
girls now. And the thought of them moving away to college sounds a little bit scary. Nevertheless, my parents supported
me even though everyone around them had reservations. Their support carried me though my undergraduate, my
masters, and eventually to my doctorate. My parents provided me an environment allowing me to dream, giving me the
opportunity to develop the courage to dream bigger. When I was uncertain my parents encouraged me to try. For every
time I said, "I can't" my parent's asked me "Why not?" For every time I reached a milestone they'd ask me, "What's
next?" As a first born in this country, oftentimes I had to navigate many uncharted territories. I was the first in my
family to get my master's degree, pursue a doctorate, move across the country multiple times, travel abroad, speaking in
file:///C/...lley%20Southeast%20Asian%20Successful%20Voices/Files%20for%20upload/34_Mailisa_Lee_API_Graduation_Speech.clean.txt[3/10/2022 9:08:35 AM]
front of you today, did I mention I kind of have a fear of public speaking? So don't be afraid to be a pioneer. I'm
thankful my brother did. As I'm not sure I would have gone to college and in turn if my four younger siblings would
have to. He made it real for us. Many of you are like my brother, the very first, blazing the trail for your siblings, your
families, and your communities. For that I thank you. While many of you may be the first, it should also be your
mission to make sure you are not the last. So make sure to dream and then dream a little bigger. Be willing to take risk
and understand that you will win some and unfortunately you will also lose some. Learn from your mistakes. We don't
always get everything right the first time so be resilient. Pick yourself back up and try again. Obstacles don't have to
stop you. "If you run into a wall, don't turn around and give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work
around it." It's a quote from Michael Jordan. It was not always easy but it will be worthwhile. Make this moment and
every other moment you have count. Be willing to get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Be willing to try new
things. Growing up I was raised to now draw attention to myself. Speak only if spoken to, do not question authority,
follow the rules and listen closely. While I love this about my upbringing, I realize it also had some drawbacks. I was so
good at not drawing attention to myself that I practically disappeared into the background. This made it difficult for me
as I went to school and to work. My demeanor labeled me as smart but not a leader, nice but not decisive, too kind, too
quiet, and the list goes on. And I don't blame them. I was a quiet leader. And this made it difficult for my professors and
supervisors to see my potential. I had to adjust, unlearn, and relearn, and still continually remind myself that it is OK to
raise my hand, to speak up, and to let my voice be heard. Being up here, this is not easy for me. This is my
uncomfortable. But I am up here because I hope I can share with you a few moments of my journey that hopefully
provide some inspiration to you. For those of you who have no trouble speaking up, good for you. For those who haven't
spoken up more than once in your class this past semester, or past year, I encourage you -- no, I challenge you to speak
up more. You have an important perspective and it won't be heard if you do not speak. I recall the first time I raised my
hand in class. It was my Sociology 125 course. It took me about 40 minutes to get the courage to raise my hand, class
was almost over, and when I was called on my face was red as a candied apple. My body temperature increased by what
felt like 100 degrees and my heart was racing. You may think I'm exaggerating but I'm not. I was scared. But let me tell
you, each moment after this got easier. So remember, take the risk and get uncomfortable. You have an important voice,
you have an important story, and only you can tell it, so let it be heard. For those of you who have all ready figured out
what you are doing after graduation career wise that is, not where you're going to dinner or happy hour, congratulations.
For those of you who are unsure like I was, here's my advice. Don't lose too much sleep over it. Follow your heart.
Remember what made you happy before everyone tried to determine it for you. It is OK for you to throw darts at the
dartboard, trying to figure out what you want to be and what you want to do. As I was getting close to graduating from
college I decided to apply for Teach for America. Since they were known for their amazing work in urban and rural
cities and I felt this is where I could make an impact. I was invited for an interview and during my interview I realized it
wasn't a good fit for me. And Teach for America did too and I was not selected. Of course I was disappointed, a little
hurt, and a little lost. Back to the drawing board I went. Then I picked myself back up and I continued to look at options.
I was living in Washington DC at the time and I considered non-profit work, government jobs, but I applied for graduate
school just in case. I received a handful of denials, which was disheartening. I remember the feeling in the moment,
confused, unsure, and losing hope. And then I was admitted to the University of Southern California. Eventually I found
myself working with student programs and services, and then I began working at admissions, and now helping students
go to college has become my career. It feels less like work but more like a calling. I'm going to paraphrase the words of
the late Steve Jobs during a commencement speech he made over 10 years ago at Stanford. It's one of my favorites.
"You can't connect the dots looking forward. You can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that
the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something, your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever."
This approach has never let me down and has made all the difference in my life. His words ring true to me. Looking
back it makes sense now why things happen they way they did. Why specific things didn't work out and why others did.
But in the moment the road ahead was hazy and in the moment you just have to work hard, not give up, and trust that
everything will work out. Today you are a pioneer paving the way forward for yourself, your families, and your
community. Today you are achieving your dream of getting a college degree and your family's dreams as well.
Remember to surround yourself with a team of cheerleaders to root for you and support you along the way. Make sure
to celebrate each milestone and achievement like today. With that said graduates can you please stand up and look
behind you to see the love and support for you here today. Let's give a round of applause to your cheerleaders. Thank
you family and friends for your love and support. Class of 2017, thank you all so much for having me here with you
today. Congratulations graduates.
file:///C/...lley%20Southeast%20Asian%20Successful%20Voices/Files%20for%20upload/34_Mailisa_Lee_API_Graduation_Speech.clean.txt[3/10/2022 9:08:35 AM]