Edwin Macaraeg interview
Item
Title
Edwin Macaraeg interview
Creator
Macaraeg, Edwin
Banh, Jenny
Relation
Central Valley Southeast Asian Successful Voices
Coverage
Fresno, California
Date
6/7/2017
Rights
Copyright has been transferred to Fresno State
Identifier
SCMS_casv_00011
extracted text
>> Hello, today is Wednesday, June 7, 2017. I'm interviewing someone today, if you can actually A say your
name, spell your name, tell me the date, and also give me verbal permission to interview you, that will be
great.
>> My name is Edwin Macaraeg. Spell out my name too?
>> Yes.
>> E D W I N M A C A R A E G and I give Professor Jamie Bond, permission to conduct this interview.
>> Great.
>> Anything else?
>> That's it. Thank you Edwin, honestly, I'm very appreciative for you, this actually could actually have a
very positive, huge positive contribution to Fresno State but not just Fresno State but to other Southeast
Asians who are also struggling in America, and so first I would like to say thank you so much for that
because it's a great thing.
>> I enjoy helping out on this kind of, you know, Asian thing.
>> Okay so I guess I'll go in order. Your name, you told me. What is the ender that you identify as?
>> Male.
>> Male, what is the ethnic group that you identify as?
>> Filipino.
>> Filipino, okay. Where were you born?
>> I was born in Lemoore, Naval Air Station.
>> Okay, great. Where is Lemoore?
>> Lemoore is about 40 minutes south of Fresno.
>> Oh! Wow, okay, interesting.
>> Pretty close, it's a very small city, in a small town.
>> Great, what generation do you identify as? 1st, 1.5, or 2nd?
>> I'm a 2nd generation.
>> Oh, 2nd generation, okay. What is your mother and father's highest education?
>> They both have their high school diploma and that's pretty much it.
>> Great, what is your family composition that you grew up in before and what is your family composition
that you grew up now?
>> I had my mother and father and my two siblings, an older brother and a younger sister. You mean my
family, with my family?
>> Yeah, what's the present and what's the past.
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>> Okay so that was my past,... it's just me and my wife and my two sons, I have Lunas here, he's 5 years
old and my second born son Maximus whose maybe 8 months now so...
>> Oh! Congratulations, my friend's also named Max.
>> Oh really?
>> Maxwell, great, and congratulations, that's a little old baby, okay. Alright, great, okay I don't know if you
remember but what was your GPA?
>> In here or in high school?
>> In college.
>> In college, I think in college I was maybe a 3.2.
>> Okay, great.
>> For my MA, I think I had 1B so.
>> Great.
>> But in high School, I was maybe a C average, 2.71, if I could remember.
>> Oh great, okay, and you're a professor now, so excellent okay. What would you say your socioeconomic
background was? Was it working, middle, affluent which is like rich?
>> I'll probably say lower middle-class.
>> Okay.
>> My father was in the military so it helped out a lot and my mom had a much pretty much the same job
that a lot of the families had in Lemoore so it's pretty much... Yeah, in Lemoore it was probably hard to, not
too much opportunity there so I'd probably say lower middle class.
>> Okay, excellent, okay. And so after that, when I get into the nitty-gritty, again, the next couple of
questions and this is the first half, the first third of it, and you may not know the answer, most people don't
know the answer so that's okay, just pass it okay. What percentage of Filipinos go to college?
>> I will probably say it feels... I don't have too many friends that didn't go to college to be honest.
>> Oh wow.
>> Yeah, it's pretty high but I wouldn't say a lot of them went to a four year. A lot of them at least
experience some sort of maybe vocational schooling, maybe nursing
>> Oh okay.
>>... So I'd probably say it's a pretty high number. At least out of the acquaintances I have, it feels like over
50 percent for sure.
>> Okay.
>> For both men and women, so I don't know in exact number but I thinks it's pretty high.
>> Okay.
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>> I would probably say it's pretty high for Filipinos.
>> Okay, great.
>> Yeah, it feels like it.
>> Okay, alright so do Filipino students, well actually let's compare, in comparison of Filipino students are
the highest graduating for Southeast Asian, and if you compare a Filipino with Hmong or Mien, it's the
highest, right in graduate but if you compare it with South Asian, it's quite low, right. Can you speak a little
bit about why is it the highest for Southeast Asian but yet low for you know, with a South Asian?
>> I feel like for, at least for Filipinos, I think that they have somewhat of a head start in terms of, I guess,
the American educational system because I feel that for the Hmong people, the Mien people, Cambodians,
Laos, they kind of came here at the end of sort of that whole Asian migration period and so it's like they're
still, I will probably say out of at least my acquaintances, they're still like settling into American life opposed
to Filipinos have a little bit more like I'll probably say a lot of Filipinos that I grew up, they came here around
the 70s because of the military opposed to say the Southeast Asians like the Hmong people. They probably
came here around the late 80s or the early 80s and so because of that, I'll probably say even earlier than the
70s for the Filipinos, so it's a little bit earlier and I think that contributed to, I guess it gave the Filipinos an
idea, "Oh this is what Americans are doing." But for the new immigrants, they're kind of still settling, I'll
probably say the language barrier is a big part, I could say that I had a lot of friends that are Hmong and
most of their parents don't speak English. For Filipinos, we have grandparents that speak English so....
>> Oh wow, really, really?
>> Yeah, my grandma she was able to speak English. She's not a 100 percent good but even say my inlaws, they're from China and they're new here and their English, they don't really speak it that well, so I
think that the whole, I guess the Filipinos had this, I guess an advantage because they came here early and
so they were able to see what all these Americans are doing to try to become better.
>> Do your mom and dad speak English?
>> Yes.
>> Oh, they speak fluent English?
>> Yeah, they have the accent...
>> Wow, okay.
>> They pretty much understand everything that you know me and my siblings talk about.
>> Wow, that is really different for a Southeast Asian.
>> Yeah, and opposed to my friends who were, there is a small town called Hanford near Lemoore and
there's a lot of Hmong people there for a certain time and that's where I got I guess a lot of my exposure to
their people and I was like wow, their parents don't speak English, you know, and so there was like this, it's
like they have that, it's like a 1.5 generation kind thing where they're kind of in-between cultures, but then
they are also like struggling to find their own identity.
>> Right.
>> Opposed to like 2nd generation Asians where they are kind of, you know, we're comfortable here, we
don't really have anything to prove, you know, like that. But also like the 1.5 generations or even like the
First generations that are here, they're still like adjusting.
>> Right.
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>> You know, basic things like habits, like manners, superstitions, yeah and it's kind of, I feel that for a lot
of the Asian cultures, that's a really big part of their, I guess their whole upbringing is that they, that they
hold those values true even till the point they're already had been living here in US and sometimes there's a
conflict and I feel like that can kind of hold them back a little bit. But then the kids are different; they adjust
and they're already trying to teach their parents how to [inaudible] and things like that but I think that for
the most part, it's like a, again like the Filipino people had, like they had a little bit of a, you know, they have
like a couple of steps ahead of the other Southeast Asians.
>> So Edwin can you speak more to how Filipinos in one hand, the Southeast Asians, they're the highest
graduating rate but can speak why in comparison to a South Asian, I mean from India, why is it that they
are lower? The South Asia or India?
>> I think that Indian, their culture, they have a more stabilized I guess, let me see, I think that they're very
good at the whole academic process which is something that they probably inherited from you know, the
British...
>> Right.
>> Occupation there but I think that they have very, I guess, high expectations of their children and I think
that that level of control or being able to be that strict with their kids is sort of paying off, but then I think
that for Filipinos, it seems like they tried that but I don't know if they can get away with it, their kids are a
little bit more rebellious and I think that it's a little bit, it's a little more about the difference in culture. I think
that I would say Indian kids, Indian families are a little more strict. I remember I had a friend growing up
and he was Indian, he was one of the few Indian people in Lemoore and he was very strict but then his
parents were very strict but because of that, he was so successful and it was like we would make fun of him
because of you know, oh you can't do this and you can't... and then whenever he would like go out of his,
you know, whenever he was like loose a little bit, it would feel weird because he doesn't feel like it. It really
matches him I think because of his culture, it's like they have a very strict upbringing and just seeing my
friend the way he is, I could imagine a lot of kids within, you know, his culture being that same way; it's like
they have a very strict upbringing and that they hold true to it. Opposed to other Asian cultures, they're
probably more loose, they don't...
>> Excellent. You're a faculty member, why do or do Filipino students have strong relations with
administrators and faculty? Why or why not? Do they?
>> I feel like they, I feel like at least from my experience, they're just more about I think that they're just
more about pleasing their parents.
>> Okay.
>> But in terms of creating a relationship outside of school, I don't really see them getting close to their
professors and things like that, I never really see that. Even with my sister who, she works as a counselor
but we don't really have too many Filipinos students though. I only had maybe throughout my time of
teaching, I had one...
>> Oh my goodness, okay but there's a lot [laughs]
>> I teach in the [not clear] lot less.
>> Okay and were more Latino.
>> Yeah.
>> Okay, what's your favorite subject and what's your least favorite subject?
>> I think my favorite subject would probably be, you mean that sort of my major and all that?
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>> Yeah, well whatever, it could be your major too.
>> That's a pretty hard question. I think Anthropology was probably one of my favorites. Yeah, I like
Anthropology, I love studying about cultures and religions.
>> Oh great. What's your least favorite?
>> My least favorite? Probably things like Economics [laughter].
>> Okay, All right. What makes a good Professor and what makes a bad professor according to you?
>> A good professor is one that, that is in touch with their students.
>> In touch with students, okay.
>> Because I think for the most part, whenever students really have something to complain about it's
because of the lack of their connection, it's like they didn't really understand them, I tried to email the
student, I mean I tried to email my professor but it took him a long time to email me back. It was a lot
more, something like that like there wasn't really a strong connection there.
>> Okay.
>> And so I think that's pretty much what makes a professor I guess they look at them as not so good just
because they don't really connect, they don't have that connection, that teacher-student connection.
Opposed to a good professor, tries to, tries to accommodate them.
>> Okay.
>> And I can imagine how hard it is especially because you know, we have this big forum classes and it's
hard and they email all the time but I think that if your professor is good, they'll try to do whatever they can
to try to accommodate them. I think that's basically it, and that the good professors are constantly updating
the syllabus like every semester they get better and I think that's what makes them better as professors.
>> Okay.
>> But yeah I think for the most part, it's more about the connection between the professor and the student
because I hear a lot of complaints about you know, students trying to email their professors and they're just
yeah, he doesn't really care about me. You know, it's just like that...
>> Okay.
>> Even in art, we had that a lot and so that was...
>> Wow, okay.
>> I was in the art program for a long time, it's just they say yeah the professor, you know, he doesn't talk
to me or he doesn't you know, it's like a like a little bit of neglect there but...
>> Okay, interesting. Have you ever been mentored?
>> Technically, not really, I'd probably say no. I think that, I think that one thing that I can tell you is that
I'm a returning student and I think that that's what makes... Oh that doubles one of the questions for later
on but it's more like I sort of found my direction and I just pursued it without, you know, I tried going to
school then I got out and then I came back so then I started doing better. But in terms of being mentored,
not really.
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>> Okay.
>> I had one professor tell me to switch majors and I followed his advice.
>> Okay.
>> And I think that I looked up to him after that and whenever I had questions, I would try to email him.
He's Professor Douglas Hansen, he's in the graphic design department and he was... I looked him as one of
my mentors and I think that for the most part, I was kind of on my own.
>> Okay.
>> Yeah.
>> On your own okay, excellent, this is one third done and my last question is what were the teacher
expectations of you? Were they neutral, low or high? And then what was the teacher expectation of your coethnics? Like so one is your personal, this one was and then what was of your ethnic group?
>> Okay teacher expectations, I feel like my most of my teacher expectations for me were pretty high.
>> Oh okay.
>> I'd probably to say that. I think because a lot of the, it's like that model minority thing maybe.
>> Oh, yeah, okay, interesting.
>> I think that especially in my department it's like after they're somewhat aware of your work then they
have these high expectations. They, oh yeah, you can do that, yeah he's going to do it so well and he's
showing and all those stuff.
>> Oh wow, okay. What about your ethnic group though?
>> My ethnic group?
>> Specifically Asian or Southeast Asian?
>> Yeah.
>> Were they high or no?
>> Oh in terms of schooling?
>> Yes.
>> Things like that?
>> Do they think of may be Asians high or maybe low?
>> You mean the expectations for my major or just...
>> No, your entire ethnic group.
>> Okay.
>> Like what did your teachers think of your whole Asian or Southeast Asian ethnic group?
>> I think being in Fresno, it was kind of neutral.
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>> Neutral? Okay.
>> It was like we had the sort of the model minority type students but then also there was a lot of students
that we're going to school that were, I guess, they weren't on the right track yet, they were still sort of
growing up. I saw that during my year stay at FCC, Fresno City College, they're still like gangsters, they're
still you know, were trying to do something cool and it was like really a strong I guess separation between
serious students and not so serious students.
>> Oh interesting.
>> So I'll probably say it was very neutral, it's somewhere not high and not low.
>> Okay, what were the notable, and this will be one third done and this is the second third and the last
third. What were notable Filipino media depictions that you saw in the United States? It might be zero
because some other students were like there's no depiction of us.
>> Yeah.
>> Were there any Filipino depictions at all that that you saw?
>> On media?
>> Yes.
>> I'm trying to think... There's not a whole lot that are actually positive, I would probably say the biggest
thing is like Manny Pacquiao...
>> Oh okay.
>> Other than that, it's not really a good, it's not a very positive depiction of Filipino culture instead it's you
know, it's fighting, it's boxing, you know, it's a sport where people have to beat each other up and of course
the people who are from say like a very poor country can excel in that and so I think that for the most part,
I don't think that Filipinos are depicted on media other than...
>> Invisible?
>> Yeah.
>> Okay.
>> Yeah, very little exposure, if none, if any.
>> Okay so after this one, I'll ask you to bear it and that's when I shall specifically ask you what it's like
being Asian American male but wait for this one.
>> Okay.
>> Do you think that you are academically prepared for college from high school?
>> No, I'd probably say no. It seems like we had to relearn everything when we were going to school.
Maybe it was the school that I grew up in Lemoore, maybe we were behind then from say schools from
Clovis or Fresno and they're just maybe their standards are higher but it seems like when I tried going to
college after high school, I did really bad and that's one of the reasons why I returned to school. I wanted to
I guess find more reason to try hard because it was different but then in terms of...
>> What were you not being prepared about? So you think it was not as rigorous your high school? What
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else? Anything else? Did you think the classes were not rigorous enough?
>> I think that they were too; I'd probably say they were very hard, they were really, they were pretty
tough and I wasn't really expecting that. I think it's just that in college you had more flexibility and then we
just, just coming from high school, we're not really, we're just kind of following everyone opposed to in
college we had to be more on our own and it seems like I haven't found that yet and I see that actually in a
lot of students now. They're still, they're not serious yet, they haven't so that's [not clear], it was a lot harder
in college when right at high school is very difficult.
>> Okay, great, thank you so one third of the interview is over okay. So this part is the barriers and actually
the success questions are identical to barriers, it's just a switch, okay. So Edwin, we discussed earlier that
there is actually a relatively low southeast Asian graduation rates so you're part of a unicorn. Get ready for
your son here because he's actually like absorbing anything that you don't know. What do you think, can you
speak for Southeast Asian American males because we talked about how it is not just an Asian issue but
Southeast Asia but it's also gendered issue?
>> Yeah.
>> So can you talk a little about the barriers for just a Southeast Asian male and what do you think, I mean
you could talk about yourself or just the collective, what are the barriers for a Southeast Asian male?
>> I think from my perspective, I would probably say sort of what I mentioned earlier that being an Asian
male is, is like we are in a very stigmatized group.
>> Really?
>> In terms of, it just seems like, I think it's like when we transition from say like the home life into the
school life, it's almost like we had to have the social life, the home life do well in order for us to do well in
school.
>> What do you mean?
>> It's kind of like, I guess to make it simple, it's not like we were being happy enough and I think that it's
because of the whole social thing in terms of dating. I think that has a really big part of the stigmatism that
comes along with being an Asian male. It's like...
>> What do you mean, did you define stigmatism? Like what do you mean?
>> I'd probably say that Asian males are like the least popular to date in terms of say Asian females.
>> Okay.
>> Or Hispanic males, or African American males, it seems like Asian males are very, they're not really, we
are not the ideal, we are, instead we simply are the mysterious, it's almost like we are not portrayed in
media therefore it's not like we're putting an image out there that is favorable.
>> Does that affect academics?
>> I think so.
>> How does that affect academics?
>> I feel like when they're not doing well in their social life, it seems like they kind of give up on those kind
of things like those somewhat long-term goals and I feel like I speak out of the experience of myself and my
friends because I have a lot of friends who went Fresno State but they didn't pass.
>> Okay.
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>> They didn't graduate maybe like two or three classes but basically, I think that they would complain
about things like their social life like one of the first things awkward is in a world where we're at the age
we're meeting people, who are dating and some of our friends are already getting married.
>> Really, so young.
>> Yeah and it seems like when those guys that aren't really, you know you, they're not really achieving
that then it seems like they have less to I guess it seems like it's harder for them to achieve those goals and
it's like they think they need that, I guess that space to be filled...
>> Interesting.
>> Yeah, they need to be in a relationship to feel more confident.
>> It goes against the model minority myth, what does it mean, on one hand all Asian guys are engineers,
other hand it's your time at the social life is a big issue.
>> Yeah, I think so and it's like the same guys that work, that didn't graduate school they're still single even
though you know, we are already in our 30s and even my friends are in their 40s, it's like for some reason
there's a connection there, yeah.
>> So do you think that's the reason why Fresno State we're not retaining the Southeast Asian males that
we should retain? Do you think that has some element?
>> I think it's a part of that. I probably wouldn't say it's a 100 you know, it's like on the dot but I think that
the social aspect of it isn't there, and I think that because of how Asian males are somewhat again, you
know, we are like the least favorable to date and therefore there's a lot of things sort of tied to that in terms
of our confidence.
>> So it's interlinking to other things.
>> I believe so.
>> Oh okay.
>> It's one of those things that, you know, it's kind of hard to admit because you know, what do you know?
You're already married and you know...
>> Alright.
>> I was single too and there was a time in my life where I feel like say I was single and I was dating
someone when it didn't work out, that's when things started falling apart in terms of school.
>> Oh interesting.
>> So it's like... And then my friends who are single, the ones that didn't graduate, they're still single and I
feel like there's again it's just it's like in front of my face and it's like okay what you're telling me is you need
to have girlfriend in order for you to do well.
>> Wow, okay.
>> And I think...
>> But do you see for Southeast Asian men, because that's the social aspect, but do you see other barriers
like culture or financial aid or institution or language barrier or whatever, math ability, I mean, definitely
social but do you see any other barriers for Southeast Asian men? So definitely, yeah. Definitely, that's a
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great contribution, the social but do you think that financial has anything to do with Southeast Asian men?
Not...
>> At least...
>> A cultural or like are there, I mean it's intersecting but do you see other issues for Southeast Asian men?
Because I see South Asian women, they have a higher graduation rate. Like Filipino women are straight so
why, I mean do you think of other barriers I guess? Like health?
>> For the guys?
>> Yeah, I mean definitely social.
>> Yeah social is for sure.
>> That's a component, but...
>> But I think that, you know, that also ties into say working and that finding jobs and stuff like that as
well. It's like, I'd probably say it's harder for them to get jobs than a lot of other, you know, ethnicities as
well.
>> Okay.
>> I was supposed to say girls, like Asian girls they work everywhere but then there's less guys you know...
>> Right, right.
>> At least you know, from my observation but I think that in terms of other barriers...
>> Like what is the alternative if you are a Filipino or a Hmong or a Mien and you don't finish Fresno State,
what is your alternate job? Like what is the pull factor?
>> Pull factors?
>> Okay yeah.
>> Which is a lot of Filipinos, they do not, there's a lot of Filipinos that are...
>> So they have alternatives?
>> Yeah.
>> So is that a pull factor out of Fresno State? I mean, one of the pulls? Okay, what's the pull to IRS and
post office?
>> It just seems like there's a lot of Filipinos that work in the post office...
>> Yeah, that's true, yeah, yeah, for sure.
>> And I have one of my best friends, he graduated, he got his bachelors in Business and he's working in a
post office so...
>> Yeah.
>> But then I think it's a good, like alternative opposed to, you know, graduating and in sort of living off of
your major, you know, the class that you...
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>> Is the income high in a post office?
>> It seems they're stable.
>> Oh really?
>> Yeah, they're more kind of...
>>... 15 years, I know exactly where your... Yes. Right, yeah it's like the Asian pull, okay.
>> But in terms of other areas though, I think yeah a lot of it... It's hard for me to pick anything outside of
the social aspect.
>> Social, okay.
>> It just seems like they turn to that all the time, it's like they're sort of blaming it on those kind of things.
>> Would you think that there is any educational barriers, do you think? The social barrier for sure but do
you think that these Southeast Asian men...?
>> You know what, I think...
>> So wondering what you think.
>> I think it's almost like any kind of minority, growing up in the US, it's almost like you had to find where
you fit. You can't really expect to be on the same level as everybody else. It's like, I think that when we,
what I think is different about me is that I took a lot of Asian American classes say at FCC...
>> Okay.
>>...It was one of my classes I took coming back because all the classes I needed were full and so... why
don't you take Asian studies...? And so I said no you know, and I feel like my exposure to the subject
opened up a lot of I guess it helped it me understand everything a little more.
>> Okay.
>> And so I was able to see where I somewhat fit into I guess the whole, I guess it's almost like I don't
really, I don't wish I was something else. I really, I found a more, a deeper appreciation to Asian people in
general opposed to before that, it was just kind of like oh you, when did you guys come in here... And now
it's almost like I can tell you why... But I think that because I was exposed to the classes, it made me more
aware of our own people and I think that because of that awareness, it made me more I guess confident
with things like going forward, I don't have something to sort of blame. It's like oh, I'm Filipino, no one
wants to date a Filipino guy, come on. How many, I did a lot of say you know, like for a lot of Filipino girls,
they would rather date you know, like Caucasians or Hispanics.
>> That is true.
>> Yeah.
>> Yes, that's a good point.
>> And since I was I guess exposed to you know, say Asian studies, I feel like that gave me a better
understanding, and it's almost like saying, it's almost like that thing where you know what your demon it as
in you name it and it's kind of like it won't really affect you as much and so I don't have like those stigmas
that sort off weigh me down opposed to say my other friends that they weren't really exposed to that
instead they blame some of their mistakes on things like oh yeah, because I was never given the chance, no
one really wants to date me, no one wants to date like a Filipino guy but then for me it was like yeah I'm
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already aware of that, I'm already aware of that so it's not going to bother me anymore. I can move forward
and so for the people that weren't exposed to it, those were the things that keep pulling them, gives them
more reason to blame and I think that... Yeah. Again, yeah, the social aspect to this is pretty strong.
>> Okay, thank you, okay. So you talked about the barriers, structural, health, gender, did you ever have to
take care of anyone else?
>> Yeah, outside of my kids, no. I never had to, I was pretty much...
>>...The job.
>> My mom helped out a lot so I was... Yeah, I think that made it a little bit easier for me too.
>> So have you ever experienced macroaggressions or microaggressions and how did it affect you? And this
is the same question: have you ever experienced like white supremacy? So for example, macroaggressions
would be someone try to lynch you and burned across on your lawn, alright, that'll be like macro but then
micro would be like you go in to class and they're like oh are you looking for the ESL classroom and so those
are like little tiny... I mean this may be, you never experienced it but did you ever experience that at all or
macro or micro?
>>... at achool?
>> Yeah.
>> Well not really, I think it's all about presentation. I think that maybe if they look at me, I think the most I
guess the most, what I experienced most is "what nationality are you?" What are you? But I wouldn't say it's
a negative thing.
>> Okay.
>> It's gets annoying after a while just because it's like you have people constantly assuming that you are...
and to me that bothers me when people assume that I'm Hispanic or they assume that I'm Cambodian.
>> Okay.
>> It's like if you were somewhat aware of the different ethnicities, then you would be more, you just ask,
it's better to just ask instead of just them assuming. I get that at school right now as a teacher, sometimes
they're like what nationality are? And so it's like I'm still feeling that but then I think in terms of anything else
that might be, anything that might be negative. I'll probably say not a whole lot, I think a lot of it is because
of my presentation when they start talking to me kind. It's kind of those things are somewhat but not really
thought about opposed to say someone who is more, like new here and they have like an accent and they
have something more something more exotic to question and to base their like assumptions on but for me
it's like, he's not Asian, so he's kind of like Americanized and so.
>> Okay, the last question which is the second third, what had, did anything hamper you to graduate and
particularly, did anything hamper you before your graduation? So you went to a junior college and came
here, what hampered you to not make it in four years and what happened? And did anything hold you back
to make you graduate as quick as possible? But you made it though...
>> Yeah.
>> And masters...
>> I think the only thing was I changed my major, I changed my major from Psychology to Art.
>> Oh okay...
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>> But I was kind of all my classes sort of aligned so I didn't really, maybe I had to spend an extra semester
but I took a lot of classes that weren't necessary when I was at FCC...
>> Okay.
>> But other than that, I'm not really, I don't say that I regret taking those classes...
>> Oh okay.
>> Because I took Japanese and I took Chinese, I don't need them.
>> As art major, no.
>> Yeah and so I just like trying to learn new language too so...
>> Oh great, okay.
>> What else can happen? Spanish I already know, not really, not a whole lot of like barriers that slowed
me down from graduating.
>> Okay excellent, thank you Edwin. So this is the last third of the questions and in the last part is you're
just going to tell me what you want. So here is, so you are the top 6 percent of the planet because only 6
percent of the planet gets a BA, what about Mr. Edwin that... What about, not in your group but what about
you personally, why you are so strong, why did you make it versus the 94 percent that did not make out on
the planet. why did, what are these personal, I guess what are these like personal kind of, about your
personality that made you persist to finish and be the top 6 percent of the planet? Probably less of course
South Asian and probably way less than 1 percent but I'm just saying only 6 percent of the planet has a BA
and you have a Masters as well so that probably puts you in the 1 percent category as in back to 1 percent.
What about Mr. Edwin that makes you so extraordinary, so great, so wonderful?
>> Well, I think I knew what I wanted, I already knew what I wanted to study.
>> Okay.
>> And I'm very passionate about it and I think that...
>> So you're passionate, you knew what you wanted...
>> Yeah.
>> Okay.
>> I didn't let those social things get in my way.
>> Okay.
>> I try not to I guess think too much about you know, having a successful dating life.
>> Okay.
>> I didn't have to, I would probably say I that I had like a really long relationship when I was young and
after I got out of that, that's when I said I'm not going to mess around anymore so I had like a... My road
ahead of me was this straight road, I didn't really have to take any, because I already know that if I were to
I guess think about my social life and try to focus more energy on that, I feel like it doesn't really get me
anywhere, it seems like I try, I'm not saying that everything worked out for me well. It's like trying to find
that balance and trying to still have fun but still study and I think that, I think that for me, I think that I
looked at school as definitely as something that was going to help me grow instead of just another you
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know, another test instead that I enjoyed it, I really enjoyed studying and that I feel like yeah like all the
classes I took, I feel like I benefited from it somehow and I think but in terms of any other reasons why, I
think that yeah I was very passionate about my subjects.
>> Can you talk a little bit about your family? What about your family that encouraged you to do well in
school, like what did they do? Like what did your mom say to you? What did your dad say to you to do well
in school? What would you say to your son to do well in school?
>> I think that I would probably say they were pretty strict on me. They wanted me to, I had an older
brother and he didn't do so well in school...
>> Okay.
>> So everything I did, they were really happy about and I think that for me to continue that, I guess that
sense of appreciation from my parents helped me to it's like I liked that attention, I liked trying to do well
and that they noticed...
>> But did they tell you do well or what? Did they say "you must do well?"
>> Yeah, yeah...
>> Did they...
>> Yeah my mom was a lot more...
>> Did your mom say you have to get a BA?
>> Oh no.
>> Just wondering... Oh no? Okay.
>> I was already working, I was working in the post office too.
>> Oh okay, great.
>> And then I started going back to school and you know so, and then from that point, it just seems like my
mom was like okay, "you know what you want to do" and after that but whenever things come up like in
terms of grades, I would tell her how well I'm doing, she'll ask.
>> Oh okay...
>> I think that she was always, she was really happy about me going back to school but then yeah, I think
that my mom probably helped out a lot in terms of, you know, like... Even I would probably say, even when
we are broke, she'll still make me go to school, like tried to, she was buying my books and stuff.
>> Oh wow, that's a big help, that's a big bridge.
>> Yeah.
>> So your mom purchased your books.
>> Yeah, she bought my books and...
>> That is a huge, okay, great. What about your father? Did he tell you to do well in school? Did he...?
>> He was really strict. He actually left our family when we were still in high school, so yeah, he was there
just when you know, around like early in my teens but other than that we didn't really, he's still around but
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he doesn't really say anything you know, he's just, he didn't really, I'd probably say he's not as supportive as
other fathers in terms of you know our school and stuff... It's just more like he just wanted to live his own
life, he couldn't really handle a family life.
>> What about your grandparents and your brother?
>> Oh my brother?
>> And grandparents.
>> My grandparents, I think my grandma from my mom's side was the only one that was alive for a good
duration of our lives so but I think that...
>> Did she ever mention college at all?
>> Yeah not really know...
>> Oh okay.
>> As long as you went to church, she was fine.
>> What about your older brother?
>> Yeah my older brother, he was...
>> Did he tell you to finish or no?
>> He was, he never really asked because he went to school before I did, he went to San Diego and he took
like one of those...he went to not Dubry but ITT, he finished that and then I started to going to school.
>> Okay, that's great.
>> And then when I started going to school, my brother, he was really supportive of me. He bought me like
a MacBook and stuff...
>> That's a lot of support. That's a big part of it, wow.
>> At the time, I was trying to, I was learning graphic design and you need a MacBook to do all the best
and so he got it for me and so even though my brother was always really supportive of that.
>> That's a huge support. To buy you a computer, very expensive. So your mom but you books and your
brother bought you a whole computer, that is a lot of family support.
>> Yeah, I think so.
>> Wow, okay so he didn't saying anything but he but he bought a... which kind of showed that...
>> I think that my brother he, he, he always thought my art was pretty unique and that, he is an artist also.
>> Oh wow, okay.
>> But he doesn't really do anything with it. Even when I started getting a little more attention from my art
then he was like, you know like now I can, It's like finally they're finally seeing how you have own style and
that he was you know, he doesn't say it with you know, words but I could tell that he was pretty proud of
that and so it makes me feel good that we're both into the same stuff and that.
>> Great.
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>> Yeah, he's into arts, I like art but then you know we play video games together, we have a pretty good
connection.
>> Great.
>> And my sister, I've a younger sister and that she got her MA before I did...
>> Oh my goodness.
>> And she's younger.
>> How did that affect you?
>> I didn't really think about getting it before until after I got my bachelors. I was like you know, I'm just
going to get my MA, I'm doing great at school right now, I'm just going to keep my momentum going.
>> So your sister kind of like led the way and what did she say to you, like what did she get her MA in?
>> She got it in counseling.
>> Okay.
>> So yeah, she got it in counseling.
>> What effect did that have on you seeing her get an MA?
>> You know when she was going to school, I feel like I was in my own little world and I wasn't really that,
you know, I wasn't that...I was happy for her, I think I was happy that there was somebody, you know, in
our family that has their MA but it wasn't really a big deal. I think that I was in my own little world to be
honest, yeah.
>> Okay, but you have high achieving siblings so I think they're pretty good too, it's excellent and then,
that's pretty good. I mean, altogether like all three of you guys went to college, that's so very rare, actually.
Okay great, and then for your success, I asked you for the bridges and this is the last question if I asked you
what do you want at Fresno State, do you think there was any cultural, I think you talked about familial, you
talked about structural... What helped you with success? Cultural, educational, financial, structural, health,
gender. Just like I asked you the barriers, do you think any of these things helped you being Asian or
educationally prepared I don't know, financial, you talked about your mom bought your books and your
brother, structural, health, gender, does that help any bridges at all?
>> You know, I think that being Asian definitely, it almost forced me to do well because everyone expects
you to do well. Again, the Model minority too, yeah you know, I think that I was very, or because of that
cultural thing, it made me more I guess, made me more competitive like it makes me feel like okay now I
had to beat other people.
>>...Okay.
>> But yeah, I think that in terms of culture, I think that for sure was a factor.
>> Were you like part of the Filipino club or were you...?
>> I was in the Asian American club, I was the Vice President.
>> Oh wow.
>> Yeah, first, I was a member and then the second year I became vice president...
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>> Okay, awesome.
>>... Fresno City College, the Asian clubs that are there are very active.
>> Really...
>> Yeah, very exciting.
>> And you were officer, how did that make you feel?
>> A lot of responsibility and it made me confident in putting things together like events because for an
Asian American club, their main I guess goal was to have the Asian American month which is in...
>> May.
>>...I think May, yeah, May is a whole month, in fact from the beginning of the month to the end, there's
like every week there is, there is like little shows, there's also a dance, and then
>>...Filipino Cultural Day...
>> In FCC, it was more like now like a Filipino night itself, just all the Asians together and it was cool. I think
I made so many friends that were you know, were not Filipino, I had a lot of my friends that were
Cambodian and we're still pretty close and...
>> Great.
>> I had a lot of friends are Hmong too so it made me...
>> Did they graduate?
>> No, okay.
>> Yeah, not my guy friends.
>> Okay, okay.
>> Well you know what? Not my Cambodian friend, he has his associates but didn't have his bachelors.
>> Oh okay, great, okay. So this is the very last on the interview. What do you want? What do you need?
First I want to ask you, do you want smaller classes? Do you want more co-ethnic professors? Do you want
more co-ethnic... and then more ethnic clubs and at the end, you're going tell me what you want in general,
ok. So alright so you went to Fresno State, was it a warm environment or was it a chilly environment for
you? Like was it a welcoming, what I mean warm, was it not welcoming as chilly. Like what did you feel
when you were at Fresno State?
>> I think that it was definitely colder in FCC just because I was a lot more involved but then at Fresno
State I noticed the students are more I guess they're more focused, they're more, they're more about doing
well in their departments opposed to the junior college where everyone, it's such a larger diversity but then
when you start to Fresno State, everyone becomes more competitive and it's like I feel like it was harder for
me to make friends...
>> Oh okay.
>>...At Fresno State, especially in my major year, yeah.
>> Okay.
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>> Most of my friends that went to school with me, we worked together, not really through school but
something else.
>> Okay.
>> And then they were music majors and we were really close but I think that it seems like there is a little
bit of like a disconnect in terms of how close I am with my professors and my classmates. It's like I already
had my own set of friends and I feel like the Fresno State environment sort of created that because
everyone wanted to do well and everyone was very focused on their departments.
>> Excellent. Did you want smaller classes in Fresno State or no difference? Do you want small classes or
no?
>> I think yeah, you know the size, I don't think, I don't think it really made a big difference.
>> Did you want full financial aid like free college at all?
>> I think so, yeah.
>> Definitely.
>> That would have made, that would've made a big difference because I struggled a lot during say the
latter part of my undergrad and even into my MA program, I was just lucky that I was able to get a few
scholarships and it helped out a lot but yeah I think that tuition thing, that almost stopped me.
>> Okay.
>> Probably tell you guys I almost didn't want to do it because I feel like okay I don't want to be in debt
that long, you know.
>> That's something I can ask for, I can ask for that?
>> Yeah.
>> Okay, what about more co-ethnic professors? Did you want to see Filipino professors or Asian
professors? Would that make a difference?
>> When I had, when I was going to FCC and I had a professor that she was Chinese but she was from
Taiwan, she was so funny and she it seems like because she was Asian, it seems like I was able to, I feel
closer to her...
>> Okay.
>> A lot of the same jokes that she would say in class, I would get it because of the whole Asian and it just
made me feel like I want to go to class more and I think that I was able to get that [not clear] somewhat
you know, it feels different, it definitely feels different when you have a teacher that's Asian and that they
were really good teachers. But I think that yeah, if I had more, I guess a more variety in terms of the
professors, that would probably make a [inaudible].
>> Excellent, what about more co-ethnic classmates? Would it make a difference if you saw more Southeast
Asians around you or even Southeast Asian males around you or no difference?
>> I could probably say that it makes a little bit of a difference. I feel like when I was taking classes during
my undergrad, we had, you know, like a culture class and there would be like a few of the Asian guys there
and we were just kind of talking, it was kind of like we were already kind of drawn to each other like...
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>> Oh really?
>>...Like talking, kind of like we've been hanging out for a while and you know, it feels different. It
definitely feels more comfortable because sometimes, at least you know, I think that you could see that even
from the time, you know, we started school, you could say that there's always like people are pretty divided
in terms of the people that they hang out with, you know if they're Hispanic, they're friends will be Hispanic
too. Not too many truly diverse set of friends...
>> Aww interesting, okay.
>> At least from what I noticed, but then I think that it's not really because of you know, like skin color but
it's because of things like, like just their mannerisms, their attitude, it's something that makes somewhat
closer to each other...
>> Okay.
>>... But yeah I think that when there are more like Asian people in a class, it feels a little bit too, you'll be
more comfortable.
>> Okay, interesting, okay.
>> It doesn't make me feel more... it's not going to make me feel more better in class but it just makes it
funner, I'll probably say that.
>> Okay, more ethnic clubs at Fresno State?
>> Yeah, at Fresno State, I think that's something that would...
>> We have many Filipino clubs at Fresno State...
>> Oh did you?
>> Yeah, a fraternity, a club and... Yeah.
>> Yeah, you know, when I was going to Fresno State, I slowed down from a lot of that...
>> Okay.
>> That was one thing that I lacked... Do they still have the Asian Pacific Review here?
>> They do, yeah.
>> Okay yeah, you still work with that...
>> Oh really? That's great, that's great, oh wow... Yes, yeah, yeah.
>>... You can text with each other...
>> Yeah, he's still around.
>> Oh yeah?
>> Yeah.
>> I think, I think there's a lot of clubs but I feel like not a lot of students are taking advantage of it.
They're just still doing their own thing and not really...
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>> Okay.
>>... I think because it's again, like at FCC where they're, I guess you know, what they want to do is not as
rigid, their department or their major is not really that strong, they're more open to it opposed to the
students that going to Fresno State, they're like that's not really a big a big deal and that's what I sort of
went through.
>> Okay. So this is the very last part and so we really want to increase the graduation rate, this is the bread
and butter, the key, you can name down the line what are the 20 things that you want at Fresno State to
increase graduation for not just Southeast Asians but Southeast Asian men, like all the things you want,
name it down the line.
>> I think the most important part is to develop an awareness, you know, I think that the classes that I
took, it helped me gain that and then because of that extra knowledge, it helped me go forward, I'd say
that. If I didn't, if I didn't take those classes, I wouldn't be as open-minded to you know, even for me to
conduct this interview, I would be somewhat you know, like...make a big deal.
>> You mean Asian American classes? What class? Asian American classes or what classes?
>> There was an Asian American studies class like the Asian, I can't remember the exact class...
>> 110 15 by Gena or Dr. Ng?
>> I took one with Dr. Ng, the communities...
>> Oh yeah, 110.
>> When I was at, do you know who John Choi is at FCC?
>> No.
>> Okay, he's probably one of my most influential teachers...
>> Oh.
>> Yeah, he's...
>> Okay, he was a...
>> Is he Korean?
>> He's Chinese.
>> Oh okay.
>> He's Chinese, he taught all the Asian American studies classes at FCC, he was also, say the Asian
American clubs advisor.
>> Oh okay.
>> He also had like a kung fu school and...
>> What!
>> He's very active...
>> Oh wow.
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>> Yeah, he is...
>> Holy Moly.
>> Yeah he is really, he's a very influential person in the community especially for a lot of the Asian students
that were going to FCC...
>> Really?
>> I'm pretty sure...
>> What is FCC? What is that?
>> Oh, Fresno City College.
>> Oh okay, I didn't really hear [laughter].
>> I think that the Asian studies, I guess the classes at Fresno City influenced me a lot...
>> Okay.
>> Because we also had Asian American...
>> So you want more of those classes.
>> Yeah if they were more, they'd helped me, it definitely open my, I guess, my pores of my just my ability
to I guess understand why things happen the way they do like patterns and whatever is happening within
our community, and I think that for my friends that went straight to Fresno State, they didn't really think
about Asian American classes at all. They were more like what I mentioned, how they have these things sort
of holding them back and they're blaming it on things like, you know, beings single, not having a good social
life opposed to me, I was more, I was exposed to those kind of you know, these numbers and that they
made a difference in how I looked at things and that if they were able to be exposed to that, those classes,
it wouldn't make them look at... It would make them I guess away a lot of the things that were sort of
holding them back a little bit and I think that having their confidence hold back a little bit is enough to stop
them from going forward.
>> Okay.
>> And I can say that for my friends that are still single and that they didn't graduate it's like together...
>> Wow, right, right.
>> It's like...
>> Okay
>>...Didn't graduate yet, they're still single and that they're still feeling like, they're blaming it on you know,
like the social aspect. But then I think that if they were a little bit more aware of the programs that they
have here, the clubs, and that were...Even if they were just you know, tried giving it a shot, maybe it will, it
will hopefully have them sit down in the class and maybe learn a little bit about it...
>> Okay.
>>... I think that one of the things that... Is Asian Studies, is that a GE class now?
>> Yes, it is a GE class.
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>> Okay, so I'm hoping that maybe is it not for upper division, just lower division or you know...
>> I think both... yeah, it's always filled.
>> I'm hoping that students are more I guess aware of those classes because they do make a big
difference. It makes us smarter of you know, what's happening within our community but also like ourselves
and seeing these patterns and that once we are aware of them, then we sort of do what we can to go
around it and that we do better. And instead of just letting those things hold them back, it's like they have
an excuse to not do well and I think that having a relatively unsuccessful social life definitely contributes to
it, it fights it.
>> Wow..Okay.
>> Yeah I would probably say like 9 out of 10 males blame it on something like that, they're like you know,
I didn't like school, I didn't think it was...
>> So you don't think it was some academic deficiency, it was a social deficiency [inaudible].
>> Yeah, I feel like it's a big part of it.
>> Wow, okay, that's interesting.
>> One thing that might be a factor is the idea that they chose a major they didn't like...
>> Okay.
>> Yeah, I have a friend that...
>> Based on their parents or just their own?
>> Yeah, I know that for a lot Filipinos, they want their kids to be engineers or writers...
>> Right, right, definitely, nurses and stuff
>>...Those are hard classes and so for me, I just wanted to graduate in the program that I can do well in
[laughter]. I didn't really go that route where I had to you know, take physics...
>> Right.
>>...Really hard classes and I think that it's because they were sort of expected to take those engineering
classes, those you know, medical terminology, they're not doing I guess what they're really passionate about
instead they're still like following what their parents want them to do...
>> Yeah, okay, great.
>> Yeah, I think it's definitely that, at least for Filipino people, they're still doing that, they're still like
following what their parents want them to do.
>> Okay, great.
>> Even if it's too hard, they'll still try to do it.
>> Okay...
>> Me, I'm like no, I'd rather just do what I'm good at.
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>> Okay, excellent, and that's actually it. Is there anything you'd like to add to the survey or interview? That
is it.
>> Yeah, I think I said a lot so...
>> Yes, thank you. Well, let me, thank you so much. I went for doing this interview, I'm going to turn it off
right now, so your comments are very valuable. Okay...
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name, spell your name, tell me the date, and also give me verbal permission to interview you, that will be
great.
>> My name is Edwin Macaraeg. Spell out my name too?
>> Yes.
>> E D W I N M A C A R A E G and I give Professor Jamie Bond, permission to conduct this interview.
>> Great.
>> Anything else?
>> That's it. Thank you Edwin, honestly, I'm very appreciative for you, this actually could actually have a
very positive, huge positive contribution to Fresno State but not just Fresno State but to other Southeast
Asians who are also struggling in America, and so first I would like to say thank you so much for that
because it's a great thing.
>> I enjoy helping out on this kind of, you know, Asian thing.
>> Okay so I guess I'll go in order. Your name, you told me. What is the ender that you identify as?
>> Male.
>> Male, what is the ethnic group that you identify as?
>> Filipino.
>> Filipino, okay. Where were you born?
>> I was born in Lemoore, Naval Air Station.
>> Okay, great. Where is Lemoore?
>> Lemoore is about 40 minutes south of Fresno.
>> Oh! Wow, okay, interesting.
>> Pretty close, it's a very small city, in a small town.
>> Great, what generation do you identify as? 1st, 1.5, or 2nd?
>> I'm a 2nd generation.
>> Oh, 2nd generation, okay. What is your mother and father's highest education?
>> They both have their high school diploma and that's pretty much it.
>> Great, what is your family composition that you grew up in before and what is your family composition
that you grew up now?
>> I had my mother and father and my two siblings, an older brother and a younger sister. You mean my
family, with my family?
>> Yeah, what's the present and what's the past.
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>> Okay so that was my past,... it's just me and my wife and my two sons, I have Lunas here, he's 5 years
old and my second born son Maximus whose maybe 8 months now so...
>> Oh! Congratulations, my friend's also named Max.
>> Oh really?
>> Maxwell, great, and congratulations, that's a little old baby, okay. Alright, great, okay I don't know if you
remember but what was your GPA?
>> In here or in high school?
>> In college.
>> In college, I think in college I was maybe a 3.2.
>> Okay, great.
>> For my MA, I think I had 1B so.
>> Great.
>> But in high School, I was maybe a C average, 2.71, if I could remember.
>> Oh great, okay, and you're a professor now, so excellent okay. What would you say your socioeconomic
background was? Was it working, middle, affluent which is like rich?
>> I'll probably say lower middle-class.
>> Okay.
>> My father was in the military so it helped out a lot and my mom had a much pretty much the same job
that a lot of the families had in Lemoore so it's pretty much... Yeah, in Lemoore it was probably hard to, not
too much opportunity there so I'd probably say lower middle class.
>> Okay, excellent, okay. And so after that, when I get into the nitty-gritty, again, the next couple of
questions and this is the first half, the first third of it, and you may not know the answer, most people don't
know the answer so that's okay, just pass it okay. What percentage of Filipinos go to college?
>> I will probably say it feels... I don't have too many friends that didn't go to college to be honest.
>> Oh wow.
>> Yeah, it's pretty high but I wouldn't say a lot of them went to a four year. A lot of them at least
experience some sort of maybe vocational schooling, maybe nursing
>> Oh okay.
>>... So I'd probably say it's a pretty high number. At least out of the acquaintances I have, it feels like over
50 percent for sure.
>> Okay.
>> For both men and women, so I don't know in exact number but I thinks it's pretty high.
>> Okay.
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>> I would probably say it's pretty high for Filipinos.
>> Okay, great.
>> Yeah, it feels like it.
>> Okay, alright so do Filipino students, well actually let's compare, in comparison of Filipino students are
the highest graduating for Southeast Asian, and if you compare a Filipino with Hmong or Mien, it's the
highest, right in graduate but if you compare it with South Asian, it's quite low, right. Can you speak a little
bit about why is it the highest for Southeast Asian but yet low for you know, with a South Asian?
>> I feel like for, at least for Filipinos, I think that they have somewhat of a head start in terms of, I guess,
the American educational system because I feel that for the Hmong people, the Mien people, Cambodians,
Laos, they kind of came here at the end of sort of that whole Asian migration period and so it's like they're
still, I will probably say out of at least my acquaintances, they're still like settling into American life opposed
to Filipinos have a little bit more like I'll probably say a lot of Filipinos that I grew up, they came here around
the 70s because of the military opposed to say the Southeast Asians like the Hmong people. They probably
came here around the late 80s or the early 80s and so because of that, I'll probably say even earlier than the
70s for the Filipinos, so it's a little bit earlier and I think that contributed to, I guess it gave the Filipinos an
idea, "Oh this is what Americans are doing." But for the new immigrants, they're kind of still settling, I'll
probably say the language barrier is a big part, I could say that I had a lot of friends that are Hmong and
most of their parents don't speak English. For Filipinos, we have grandparents that speak English so....
>> Oh wow, really, really?
>> Yeah, my grandma she was able to speak English. She's not a 100 percent good but even say my inlaws, they're from China and they're new here and their English, they don't really speak it that well, so I
think that the whole, I guess the Filipinos had this, I guess an advantage because they came here early and
so they were able to see what all these Americans are doing to try to become better.
>> Do your mom and dad speak English?
>> Yes.
>> Oh, they speak fluent English?
>> Yeah, they have the accent...
>> Wow, okay.
>> They pretty much understand everything that you know me and my siblings talk about.
>> Wow, that is really different for a Southeast Asian.
>> Yeah, and opposed to my friends who were, there is a small town called Hanford near Lemoore and
there's a lot of Hmong people there for a certain time and that's where I got I guess a lot of my exposure to
their people and I was like wow, their parents don't speak English, you know, and so there was like this, it's
like they have that, it's like a 1.5 generation kind thing where they're kind of in-between cultures, but then
they are also like struggling to find their own identity.
>> Right.
>> Opposed to like 2nd generation Asians where they are kind of, you know, we're comfortable here, we
don't really have anything to prove, you know, like that. But also like the 1.5 generations or even like the
First generations that are here, they're still like adjusting.
>> Right.
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>> You know, basic things like habits, like manners, superstitions, yeah and it's kind of, I feel that for a lot
of the Asian cultures, that's a really big part of their, I guess their whole upbringing is that they, that they
hold those values true even till the point they're already had been living here in US and sometimes there's a
conflict and I feel like that can kind of hold them back a little bit. But then the kids are different; they adjust
and they're already trying to teach their parents how to [inaudible] and things like that but I think that for
the most part, it's like a, again like the Filipino people had, like they had a little bit of a, you know, they have
like a couple of steps ahead of the other Southeast Asians.
>> So Edwin can you speak more to how Filipinos in one hand, the Southeast Asians, they're the highest
graduating rate but can speak why in comparison to a South Asian, I mean from India, why is it that they
are lower? The South Asia or India?
>> I think that Indian, their culture, they have a more stabilized I guess, let me see, I think that they're very
good at the whole academic process which is something that they probably inherited from you know, the
British...
>> Right.
>> Occupation there but I think that they have very, I guess, high expectations of their children and I think
that that level of control or being able to be that strict with their kids is sort of paying off, but then I think
that for Filipinos, it seems like they tried that but I don't know if they can get away with it, their kids are a
little bit more rebellious and I think that it's a little bit, it's a little more about the difference in culture. I think
that I would say Indian kids, Indian families are a little more strict. I remember I had a friend growing up
and he was Indian, he was one of the few Indian people in Lemoore and he was very strict but then his
parents were very strict but because of that, he was so successful and it was like we would make fun of him
because of you know, oh you can't do this and you can't... and then whenever he would like go out of his,
you know, whenever he was like loose a little bit, it would feel weird because he doesn't feel like it. It really
matches him I think because of his culture, it's like they have a very strict upbringing and just seeing my
friend the way he is, I could imagine a lot of kids within, you know, his culture being that same way; it's like
they have a very strict upbringing and that they hold true to it. Opposed to other Asian cultures, they're
probably more loose, they don't...
>> Excellent. You're a faculty member, why do or do Filipino students have strong relations with
administrators and faculty? Why or why not? Do they?
>> I feel like they, I feel like at least from my experience, they're just more about I think that they're just
more about pleasing their parents.
>> Okay.
>> But in terms of creating a relationship outside of school, I don't really see them getting close to their
professors and things like that, I never really see that. Even with my sister who, she works as a counselor
but we don't really have too many Filipinos students though. I only had maybe throughout my time of
teaching, I had one...
>> Oh my goodness, okay but there's a lot [laughs]
>> I teach in the [not clear] lot less.
>> Okay and were more Latino.
>> Yeah.
>> Okay, what's your favorite subject and what's your least favorite subject?
>> I think my favorite subject would probably be, you mean that sort of my major and all that?
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>> Yeah, well whatever, it could be your major too.
>> That's a pretty hard question. I think Anthropology was probably one of my favorites. Yeah, I like
Anthropology, I love studying about cultures and religions.
>> Oh great. What's your least favorite?
>> My least favorite? Probably things like Economics [laughter].
>> Okay, All right. What makes a good Professor and what makes a bad professor according to you?
>> A good professor is one that, that is in touch with their students.
>> In touch with students, okay.
>> Because I think for the most part, whenever students really have something to complain about it's
because of the lack of their connection, it's like they didn't really understand them, I tried to email the
student, I mean I tried to email my professor but it took him a long time to email me back. It was a lot
more, something like that like there wasn't really a strong connection there.
>> Okay.
>> And so I think that's pretty much what makes a professor I guess they look at them as not so good just
because they don't really connect, they don't have that connection, that teacher-student connection.
Opposed to a good professor, tries to, tries to accommodate them.
>> Okay.
>> And I can imagine how hard it is especially because you know, we have this big forum classes and it's
hard and they email all the time but I think that if your professor is good, they'll try to do whatever they can
to try to accommodate them. I think that's basically it, and that the good professors are constantly updating
the syllabus like every semester they get better and I think that's what makes them better as professors.
>> Okay.
>> But yeah I think for the most part, it's more about the connection between the professor and the student
because I hear a lot of complaints about you know, students trying to email their professors and they're just
yeah, he doesn't really care about me. You know, it's just like that...
>> Okay.
>> Even in art, we had that a lot and so that was...
>> Wow, okay.
>> I was in the art program for a long time, it's just they say yeah the professor, you know, he doesn't talk
to me or he doesn't you know, it's like a like a little bit of neglect there but...
>> Okay, interesting. Have you ever been mentored?
>> Technically, not really, I'd probably say no. I think that, I think that one thing that I can tell you is that
I'm a returning student and I think that that's what makes... Oh that doubles one of the questions for later
on but it's more like I sort of found my direction and I just pursued it without, you know, I tried going to
school then I got out and then I came back so then I started doing better. But in terms of being mentored,
not really.
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>> Okay.
>> I had one professor tell me to switch majors and I followed his advice.
>> Okay.
>> And I think that I looked up to him after that and whenever I had questions, I would try to email him.
He's Professor Douglas Hansen, he's in the graphic design department and he was... I looked him as one of
my mentors and I think that for the most part, I was kind of on my own.
>> Okay.
>> Yeah.
>> On your own okay, excellent, this is one third done and my last question is what were the teacher
expectations of you? Were they neutral, low or high? And then what was the teacher expectation of your coethnics? Like so one is your personal, this one was and then what was of your ethnic group?
>> Okay teacher expectations, I feel like my most of my teacher expectations for me were pretty high.
>> Oh okay.
>> I'd probably to say that. I think because a lot of the, it's like that model minority thing maybe.
>> Oh, yeah, okay, interesting.
>> I think that especially in my department it's like after they're somewhat aware of your work then they
have these high expectations. They, oh yeah, you can do that, yeah he's going to do it so well and he's
showing and all those stuff.
>> Oh wow, okay. What about your ethnic group though?
>> My ethnic group?
>> Specifically Asian or Southeast Asian?
>> Yeah.
>> Were they high or no?
>> Oh in terms of schooling?
>> Yes.
>> Things like that?
>> Do they think of may be Asians high or maybe low?
>> You mean the expectations for my major or just...
>> No, your entire ethnic group.
>> Okay.
>> Like what did your teachers think of your whole Asian or Southeast Asian ethnic group?
>> I think being in Fresno, it was kind of neutral.
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>> Neutral? Okay.
>> It was like we had the sort of the model minority type students but then also there was a lot of students
that we're going to school that were, I guess, they weren't on the right track yet, they were still sort of
growing up. I saw that during my year stay at FCC, Fresno City College, they're still like gangsters, they're
still you know, were trying to do something cool and it was like really a strong I guess separation between
serious students and not so serious students.
>> Oh interesting.
>> So I'll probably say it was very neutral, it's somewhere not high and not low.
>> Okay, what were the notable, and this will be one third done and this is the second third and the last
third. What were notable Filipino media depictions that you saw in the United States? It might be zero
because some other students were like there's no depiction of us.
>> Yeah.
>> Were there any Filipino depictions at all that that you saw?
>> On media?
>> Yes.
>> I'm trying to think... There's not a whole lot that are actually positive, I would probably say the biggest
thing is like Manny Pacquiao...
>> Oh okay.
>> Other than that, it's not really a good, it's not a very positive depiction of Filipino culture instead it's you
know, it's fighting, it's boxing, you know, it's a sport where people have to beat each other up and of course
the people who are from say like a very poor country can excel in that and so I think that for the most part,
I don't think that Filipinos are depicted on media other than...
>> Invisible?
>> Yeah.
>> Okay.
>> Yeah, very little exposure, if none, if any.
>> Okay so after this one, I'll ask you to bear it and that's when I shall specifically ask you what it's like
being Asian American male but wait for this one.
>> Okay.
>> Do you think that you are academically prepared for college from high school?
>> No, I'd probably say no. It seems like we had to relearn everything when we were going to school.
Maybe it was the school that I grew up in Lemoore, maybe we were behind then from say schools from
Clovis or Fresno and they're just maybe their standards are higher but it seems like when I tried going to
college after high school, I did really bad and that's one of the reasons why I returned to school. I wanted to
I guess find more reason to try hard because it was different but then in terms of...
>> What were you not being prepared about? So you think it was not as rigorous your high school? What
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else? Anything else? Did you think the classes were not rigorous enough?
>> I think that they were too; I'd probably say they were very hard, they were really, they were pretty
tough and I wasn't really expecting that. I think it's just that in college you had more flexibility and then we
just, just coming from high school, we're not really, we're just kind of following everyone opposed to in
college we had to be more on our own and it seems like I haven't found that yet and I see that actually in a
lot of students now. They're still, they're not serious yet, they haven't so that's [not clear], it was a lot harder
in college when right at high school is very difficult.
>> Okay, great, thank you so one third of the interview is over okay. So this part is the barriers and actually
the success questions are identical to barriers, it's just a switch, okay. So Edwin, we discussed earlier that
there is actually a relatively low southeast Asian graduation rates so you're part of a unicorn. Get ready for
your son here because he's actually like absorbing anything that you don't know. What do you think, can you
speak for Southeast Asian American males because we talked about how it is not just an Asian issue but
Southeast Asia but it's also gendered issue?
>> Yeah.
>> So can you talk a little about the barriers for just a Southeast Asian male and what do you think, I mean
you could talk about yourself or just the collective, what are the barriers for a Southeast Asian male?
>> I think from my perspective, I would probably say sort of what I mentioned earlier that being an Asian
male is, is like we are in a very stigmatized group.
>> Really?
>> In terms of, it just seems like, I think it's like when we transition from say like the home life into the
school life, it's almost like we had to have the social life, the home life do well in order for us to do well in
school.
>> What do you mean?
>> It's kind of like, I guess to make it simple, it's not like we were being happy enough and I think that it's
because of the whole social thing in terms of dating. I think that has a really big part of the stigmatism that
comes along with being an Asian male. It's like...
>> What do you mean, did you define stigmatism? Like what do you mean?
>> I'd probably say that Asian males are like the least popular to date in terms of say Asian females.
>> Okay.
>> Or Hispanic males, or African American males, it seems like Asian males are very, they're not really, we
are not the ideal, we are, instead we simply are the mysterious, it's almost like we are not portrayed in
media therefore it's not like we're putting an image out there that is favorable.
>> Does that affect academics?
>> I think so.
>> How does that affect academics?
>> I feel like when they're not doing well in their social life, it seems like they kind of give up on those kind
of things like those somewhat long-term goals and I feel like I speak out of the experience of myself and my
friends because I have a lot of friends who went Fresno State but they didn't pass.
>> Okay.
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>> They didn't graduate maybe like two or three classes but basically, I think that they would complain
about things like their social life like one of the first things awkward is in a world where we're at the age
we're meeting people, who are dating and some of our friends are already getting married.
>> Really, so young.
>> Yeah and it seems like when those guys that aren't really, you know you, they're not really achieving
that then it seems like they have less to I guess it seems like it's harder for them to achieve those goals and
it's like they think they need that, I guess that space to be filled...
>> Interesting.
>> Yeah, they need to be in a relationship to feel more confident.
>> It goes against the model minority myth, what does it mean, on one hand all Asian guys are engineers,
other hand it's your time at the social life is a big issue.
>> Yeah, I think so and it's like the same guys that work, that didn't graduate school they're still single even
though you know, we are already in our 30s and even my friends are in their 40s, it's like for some reason
there's a connection there, yeah.
>> So do you think that's the reason why Fresno State we're not retaining the Southeast Asian males that
we should retain? Do you think that has some element?
>> I think it's a part of that. I probably wouldn't say it's a 100 you know, it's like on the dot but I think that
the social aspect of it isn't there, and I think that because of how Asian males are somewhat again, you
know, we are like the least favorable to date and therefore there's a lot of things sort of tied to that in terms
of our confidence.
>> So it's interlinking to other things.
>> I believe so.
>> Oh okay.
>> It's one of those things that, you know, it's kind of hard to admit because you know, what do you know?
You're already married and you know...
>> Alright.
>> I was single too and there was a time in my life where I feel like say I was single and I was dating
someone when it didn't work out, that's when things started falling apart in terms of school.
>> Oh interesting.
>> So it's like... And then my friends who are single, the ones that didn't graduate, they're still single and I
feel like there's again it's just it's like in front of my face and it's like okay what you're telling me is you need
to have girlfriend in order for you to do well.
>> Wow, okay.
>> And I think...
>> But do you see for Southeast Asian men, because that's the social aspect, but do you see other barriers
like culture or financial aid or institution or language barrier or whatever, math ability, I mean, definitely
social but do you see any other barriers for Southeast Asian men? So definitely, yeah. Definitely, that's a
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great contribution, the social but do you think that financial has anything to do with Southeast Asian men?
Not...
>> At least...
>> A cultural or like are there, I mean it's intersecting but do you see other issues for Southeast Asian men?
Because I see South Asian women, they have a higher graduation rate. Like Filipino women are straight so
why, I mean do you think of other barriers I guess? Like health?
>> For the guys?
>> Yeah, I mean definitely social.
>> Yeah social is for sure.
>> That's a component, but...
>> But I think that, you know, that also ties into say working and that finding jobs and stuff like that as
well. It's like, I'd probably say it's harder for them to get jobs than a lot of other, you know, ethnicities as
well.
>> Okay.
>> I was supposed to say girls, like Asian girls they work everywhere but then there's less guys you know...
>> Right, right.
>> At least you know, from my observation but I think that in terms of other barriers...
>> Like what is the alternative if you are a Filipino or a Hmong or a Mien and you don't finish Fresno State,
what is your alternate job? Like what is the pull factor?
>> Pull factors?
>> Okay yeah.
>> Which is a lot of Filipinos, they do not, there's a lot of Filipinos that are...
>> So they have alternatives?
>> Yeah.
>> So is that a pull factor out of Fresno State? I mean, one of the pulls? Okay, what's the pull to IRS and
post office?
>> It just seems like there's a lot of Filipinos that work in the post office...
>> Yeah, that's true, yeah, yeah, for sure.
>> And I have one of my best friends, he graduated, he got his bachelors in Business and he's working in a
post office so...
>> Yeah.
>> But then I think it's a good, like alternative opposed to, you know, graduating and in sort of living off of
your major, you know, the class that you...
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>> Is the income high in a post office?
>> It seems they're stable.
>> Oh really?
>> Yeah, they're more kind of...
>>... 15 years, I know exactly where your... Yes. Right, yeah it's like the Asian pull, okay.
>> But in terms of other areas though, I think yeah a lot of it... It's hard for me to pick anything outside of
the social aspect.
>> Social, okay.
>> It just seems like they turn to that all the time, it's like they're sort of blaming it on those kind of things.
>> Would you think that there is any educational barriers, do you think? The social barrier for sure but do
you think that these Southeast Asian men...?
>> You know what, I think...
>> So wondering what you think.
>> I think it's almost like any kind of minority, growing up in the US, it's almost like you had to find where
you fit. You can't really expect to be on the same level as everybody else. It's like, I think that when we,
what I think is different about me is that I took a lot of Asian American classes say at FCC...
>> Okay.
>>...It was one of my classes I took coming back because all the classes I needed were full and so... why
don't you take Asian studies...? And so I said no you know, and I feel like my exposure to the subject
opened up a lot of I guess it helped it me understand everything a little more.
>> Okay.
>> And so I was able to see where I somewhat fit into I guess the whole, I guess it's almost like I don't
really, I don't wish I was something else. I really, I found a more, a deeper appreciation to Asian people in
general opposed to before that, it was just kind of like oh you, when did you guys come in here... And now
it's almost like I can tell you why... But I think that because I was exposed to the classes, it made me more
aware of our own people and I think that because of that awareness, it made me more I guess confident
with things like going forward, I don't have something to sort of blame. It's like oh, I'm Filipino, no one
wants to date a Filipino guy, come on. How many, I did a lot of say you know, like for a lot of Filipino girls,
they would rather date you know, like Caucasians or Hispanics.
>> That is true.
>> Yeah.
>> Yes, that's a good point.
>> And since I was I guess exposed to you know, say Asian studies, I feel like that gave me a better
understanding, and it's almost like saying, it's almost like that thing where you know what your demon it as
in you name it and it's kind of like it won't really affect you as much and so I don't have like those stigmas
that sort off weigh me down opposed to say my other friends that they weren't really exposed to that
instead they blame some of their mistakes on things like oh yeah, because I was never given the chance, no
one really wants to date me, no one wants to date like a Filipino guy but then for me it was like yeah I'm
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already aware of that, I'm already aware of that so it's not going to bother me anymore. I can move forward
and so for the people that weren't exposed to it, those were the things that keep pulling them, gives them
more reason to blame and I think that... Yeah. Again, yeah, the social aspect to this is pretty strong.
>> Okay, thank you, okay. So you talked about the barriers, structural, health, gender, did you ever have to
take care of anyone else?
>> Yeah, outside of my kids, no. I never had to, I was pretty much...
>>...The job.
>> My mom helped out a lot so I was... Yeah, I think that made it a little bit easier for me too.
>> So have you ever experienced macroaggressions or microaggressions and how did it affect you? And this
is the same question: have you ever experienced like white supremacy? So for example, macroaggressions
would be someone try to lynch you and burned across on your lawn, alright, that'll be like macro but then
micro would be like you go in to class and they're like oh are you looking for the ESL classroom and so those
are like little tiny... I mean this may be, you never experienced it but did you ever experience that at all or
macro or micro?
>>... at achool?
>> Yeah.
>> Well not really, I think it's all about presentation. I think that maybe if they look at me, I think the most I
guess the most, what I experienced most is "what nationality are you?" What are you? But I wouldn't say it's
a negative thing.
>> Okay.
>> It's gets annoying after a while just because it's like you have people constantly assuming that you are...
and to me that bothers me when people assume that I'm Hispanic or they assume that I'm Cambodian.
>> Okay.
>> It's like if you were somewhat aware of the different ethnicities, then you would be more, you just ask,
it's better to just ask instead of just them assuming. I get that at school right now as a teacher, sometimes
they're like what nationality are? And so it's like I'm still feeling that but then I think in terms of anything else
that might be, anything that might be negative. I'll probably say not a whole lot, I think a lot of it is because
of my presentation when they start talking to me kind. It's kind of those things are somewhat but not really
thought about opposed to say someone who is more, like new here and they have like an accent and they
have something more something more exotic to question and to base their like assumptions on but for me
it's like, he's not Asian, so he's kind of like Americanized and so.
>> Okay, the last question which is the second third, what had, did anything hamper you to graduate and
particularly, did anything hamper you before your graduation? So you went to a junior college and came
here, what hampered you to not make it in four years and what happened? And did anything hold you back
to make you graduate as quick as possible? But you made it though...
>> Yeah.
>> And masters...
>> I think the only thing was I changed my major, I changed my major from Psychology to Art.
>> Oh okay...
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>> But I was kind of all my classes sort of aligned so I didn't really, maybe I had to spend an extra semester
but I took a lot of classes that weren't necessary when I was at FCC...
>> Okay.
>> But other than that, I'm not really, I don't say that I regret taking those classes...
>> Oh okay.
>> Because I took Japanese and I took Chinese, I don't need them.
>> As art major, no.
>> Yeah and so I just like trying to learn new language too so...
>> Oh great, okay.
>> What else can happen? Spanish I already know, not really, not a whole lot of like barriers that slowed
me down from graduating.
>> Okay excellent, thank you Edwin. So this is the last third of the questions and in the last part is you're
just going to tell me what you want. So here is, so you are the top 6 percent of the planet because only 6
percent of the planet gets a BA, what about Mr. Edwin that... What about, not in your group but what about
you personally, why you are so strong, why did you make it versus the 94 percent that did not make out on
the planet. why did, what are these personal, I guess what are these like personal kind of, about your
personality that made you persist to finish and be the top 6 percent of the planet? Probably less of course
South Asian and probably way less than 1 percent but I'm just saying only 6 percent of the planet has a BA
and you have a Masters as well so that probably puts you in the 1 percent category as in back to 1 percent.
What about Mr. Edwin that makes you so extraordinary, so great, so wonderful?
>> Well, I think I knew what I wanted, I already knew what I wanted to study.
>> Okay.
>> And I'm very passionate about it and I think that...
>> So you're passionate, you knew what you wanted...
>> Yeah.
>> Okay.
>> I didn't let those social things get in my way.
>> Okay.
>> I try not to I guess think too much about you know, having a successful dating life.
>> Okay.
>> I didn't have to, I would probably say I that I had like a really long relationship when I was young and
after I got out of that, that's when I said I'm not going to mess around anymore so I had like a... My road
ahead of me was this straight road, I didn't really have to take any, because I already know that if I were to
I guess think about my social life and try to focus more energy on that, I feel like it doesn't really get me
anywhere, it seems like I try, I'm not saying that everything worked out for me well. It's like trying to find
that balance and trying to still have fun but still study and I think that, I think that for me, I think that I
looked at school as definitely as something that was going to help me grow instead of just another you
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know, another test instead that I enjoyed it, I really enjoyed studying and that I feel like yeah like all the
classes I took, I feel like I benefited from it somehow and I think but in terms of any other reasons why, I
think that yeah I was very passionate about my subjects.
>> Can you talk a little bit about your family? What about your family that encouraged you to do well in
school, like what did they do? Like what did your mom say to you? What did your dad say to you to do well
in school? What would you say to your son to do well in school?
>> I think that I would probably say they were pretty strict on me. They wanted me to, I had an older
brother and he didn't do so well in school...
>> Okay.
>> So everything I did, they were really happy about and I think that for me to continue that, I guess that
sense of appreciation from my parents helped me to it's like I liked that attention, I liked trying to do well
and that they noticed...
>> But did they tell you do well or what? Did they say "you must do well?"
>> Yeah, yeah...
>> Did they...
>> Yeah my mom was a lot more...
>> Did your mom say you have to get a BA?
>> Oh no.
>> Just wondering... Oh no? Okay.
>> I was already working, I was working in the post office too.
>> Oh okay, great.
>> And then I started going back to school and you know so, and then from that point, it just seems like my
mom was like okay, "you know what you want to do" and after that but whenever things come up like in
terms of grades, I would tell her how well I'm doing, she'll ask.
>> Oh okay...
>> I think that she was always, she was really happy about me going back to school but then yeah, I think
that my mom probably helped out a lot in terms of, you know, like... Even I would probably say, even when
we are broke, she'll still make me go to school, like tried to, she was buying my books and stuff.
>> Oh wow, that's a big help, that's a big bridge.
>> Yeah.
>> So your mom purchased your books.
>> Yeah, she bought my books and...
>> That is a huge, okay, great. What about your father? Did he tell you to do well in school? Did he...?
>> He was really strict. He actually left our family when we were still in high school, so yeah, he was there
just when you know, around like early in my teens but other than that we didn't really, he's still around but
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he doesn't really say anything you know, he's just, he didn't really, I'd probably say he's not as supportive as
other fathers in terms of you know our school and stuff... It's just more like he just wanted to live his own
life, he couldn't really handle a family life.
>> What about your grandparents and your brother?
>> Oh my brother?
>> And grandparents.
>> My grandparents, I think my grandma from my mom's side was the only one that was alive for a good
duration of our lives so but I think that...
>> Did she ever mention college at all?
>> Yeah not really know...
>> Oh okay.
>> As long as you went to church, she was fine.
>> What about your older brother?
>> Yeah my older brother, he was...
>> Did he tell you to finish or no?
>> He was, he never really asked because he went to school before I did, he went to San Diego and he took
like one of those...he went to not Dubry but ITT, he finished that and then I started to going to school.
>> Okay, that's great.
>> And then when I started going to school, my brother, he was really supportive of me. He bought me like
a MacBook and stuff...
>> That's a lot of support. That's a big part of it, wow.
>> At the time, I was trying to, I was learning graphic design and you need a MacBook to do all the best
and so he got it for me and so even though my brother was always really supportive of that.
>> That's a huge support. To buy you a computer, very expensive. So your mom but you books and your
brother bought you a whole computer, that is a lot of family support.
>> Yeah, I think so.
>> Wow, okay so he didn't saying anything but he but he bought a... which kind of showed that...
>> I think that my brother he, he, he always thought my art was pretty unique and that, he is an artist also.
>> Oh wow, okay.
>> But he doesn't really do anything with it. Even when I started getting a little more attention from my art
then he was like, you know like now I can, It's like finally they're finally seeing how you have own style and
that he was you know, he doesn't say it with you know, words but I could tell that he was pretty proud of
that and so it makes me feel good that we're both into the same stuff and that.
>> Great.
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>> Yeah, he's into arts, I like art but then you know we play video games together, we have a pretty good
connection.
>> Great.
>> And my sister, I've a younger sister and that she got her MA before I did...
>> Oh my goodness.
>> And she's younger.
>> How did that affect you?
>> I didn't really think about getting it before until after I got my bachelors. I was like you know, I'm just
going to get my MA, I'm doing great at school right now, I'm just going to keep my momentum going.
>> So your sister kind of like led the way and what did she say to you, like what did she get her MA in?
>> She got it in counseling.
>> Okay.
>> So yeah, she got it in counseling.
>> What effect did that have on you seeing her get an MA?
>> You know when she was going to school, I feel like I was in my own little world and I wasn't really that,
you know, I wasn't that...I was happy for her, I think I was happy that there was somebody, you know, in
our family that has their MA but it wasn't really a big deal. I think that I was in my own little world to be
honest, yeah.
>> Okay, but you have high achieving siblings so I think they're pretty good too, it's excellent and then,
that's pretty good. I mean, altogether like all three of you guys went to college, that's so very rare, actually.
Okay great, and then for your success, I asked you for the bridges and this is the last question if I asked you
what do you want at Fresno State, do you think there was any cultural, I think you talked about familial, you
talked about structural... What helped you with success? Cultural, educational, financial, structural, health,
gender. Just like I asked you the barriers, do you think any of these things helped you being Asian or
educationally prepared I don't know, financial, you talked about your mom bought your books and your
brother, structural, health, gender, does that help any bridges at all?
>> You know, I think that being Asian definitely, it almost forced me to do well because everyone expects
you to do well. Again, the Model minority too, yeah you know, I think that I was very, or because of that
cultural thing, it made me more I guess, made me more competitive like it makes me feel like okay now I
had to beat other people.
>>...Okay.
>> But yeah, I think that in terms of culture, I think that for sure was a factor.
>> Were you like part of the Filipino club or were you...?
>> I was in the Asian American club, I was the Vice President.
>> Oh wow.
>> Yeah, first, I was a member and then the second year I became vice president...
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>> Okay, awesome.
>>... Fresno City College, the Asian clubs that are there are very active.
>> Really...
>> Yeah, very exciting.
>> And you were officer, how did that make you feel?
>> A lot of responsibility and it made me confident in putting things together like events because for an
Asian American club, their main I guess goal was to have the Asian American month which is in...
>> May.
>>...I think May, yeah, May is a whole month, in fact from the beginning of the month to the end, there's
like every week there is, there is like little shows, there's also a dance, and then
>>...Filipino Cultural Day...
>> In FCC, it was more like now like a Filipino night itself, just all the Asians together and it was cool. I think
I made so many friends that were you know, were not Filipino, I had a lot of my friends that were
Cambodian and we're still pretty close and...
>> Great.
>> I had a lot of friends are Hmong too so it made me...
>> Did they graduate?
>> No, okay.
>> Yeah, not my guy friends.
>> Okay, okay.
>> Well you know what? Not my Cambodian friend, he has his associates but didn't have his bachelors.
>> Oh okay, great, okay. So this is the very last on the interview. What do you want? What do you need?
First I want to ask you, do you want smaller classes? Do you want more co-ethnic professors? Do you want
more co-ethnic... and then more ethnic clubs and at the end, you're going tell me what you want in general,
ok. So alright so you went to Fresno State, was it a warm environment or was it a chilly environment for
you? Like was it a welcoming, what I mean warm, was it not welcoming as chilly. Like what did you feel
when you were at Fresno State?
>> I think that it was definitely colder in FCC just because I was a lot more involved but then at Fresno
State I noticed the students are more I guess they're more focused, they're more, they're more about doing
well in their departments opposed to the junior college where everyone, it's such a larger diversity but then
when you start to Fresno State, everyone becomes more competitive and it's like I feel like it was harder for
me to make friends...
>> Oh okay.
>>...At Fresno State, especially in my major year, yeah.
>> Okay.
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>> Most of my friends that went to school with me, we worked together, not really through school but
something else.
>> Okay.
>> And then they were music majors and we were really close but I think that it seems like there is a little
bit of like a disconnect in terms of how close I am with my professors and my classmates. It's like I already
had my own set of friends and I feel like the Fresno State environment sort of created that because
everyone wanted to do well and everyone was very focused on their departments.
>> Excellent. Did you want smaller classes in Fresno State or no difference? Do you want small classes or
no?
>> I think yeah, you know the size, I don't think, I don't think it really made a big difference.
>> Did you want full financial aid like free college at all?
>> I think so, yeah.
>> Definitely.
>> That would have made, that would've made a big difference because I struggled a lot during say the
latter part of my undergrad and even into my MA program, I was just lucky that I was able to get a few
scholarships and it helped out a lot but yeah I think that tuition thing, that almost stopped me.
>> Okay.
>> Probably tell you guys I almost didn't want to do it because I feel like okay I don't want to be in debt
that long, you know.
>> That's something I can ask for, I can ask for that?
>> Yeah.
>> Okay, what about more co-ethnic professors? Did you want to see Filipino professors or Asian
professors? Would that make a difference?
>> When I had, when I was going to FCC and I had a professor that she was Chinese but she was from
Taiwan, she was so funny and she it seems like because she was Asian, it seems like I was able to, I feel
closer to her...
>> Okay.
>> A lot of the same jokes that she would say in class, I would get it because of the whole Asian and it just
made me feel like I want to go to class more and I think that I was able to get that [not clear] somewhat
you know, it feels different, it definitely feels different when you have a teacher that's Asian and that they
were really good teachers. But I think that yeah, if I had more, I guess a more variety in terms of the
professors, that would probably make a [inaudible].
>> Excellent, what about more co-ethnic classmates? Would it make a difference if you saw more Southeast
Asians around you or even Southeast Asian males around you or no difference?
>> I could probably say that it makes a little bit of a difference. I feel like when I was taking classes during
my undergrad, we had, you know, like a culture class and there would be like a few of the Asian guys there
and we were just kind of talking, it was kind of like we were already kind of drawn to each other like...
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>> Oh really?
>>...Like talking, kind of like we've been hanging out for a while and you know, it feels different. It
definitely feels more comfortable because sometimes, at least you know, I think that you could see that even
from the time, you know, we started school, you could say that there's always like people are pretty divided
in terms of the people that they hang out with, you know if they're Hispanic, they're friends will be Hispanic
too. Not too many truly diverse set of friends...
>> Aww interesting, okay.
>> At least from what I noticed, but then I think that it's not really because of you know, like skin color but
it's because of things like, like just their mannerisms, their attitude, it's something that makes somewhat
closer to each other...
>> Okay.
>>... But yeah I think that when there are more like Asian people in a class, it feels a little bit too, you'll be
more comfortable.
>> Okay, interesting, okay.
>> It doesn't make me feel more... it's not going to make me feel more better in class but it just makes it
funner, I'll probably say that.
>> Okay, more ethnic clubs at Fresno State?
>> Yeah, at Fresno State, I think that's something that would...
>> We have many Filipino clubs at Fresno State...
>> Oh did you?
>> Yeah, a fraternity, a club and... Yeah.
>> Yeah, you know, when I was going to Fresno State, I slowed down from a lot of that...
>> Okay.
>> That was one thing that I lacked... Do they still have the Asian Pacific Review here?
>> They do, yeah.
>> Okay yeah, you still work with that...
>> Oh really? That's great, that's great, oh wow... Yes, yeah, yeah.
>>... You can text with each other...
>> Yeah, he's still around.
>> Oh yeah?
>> Yeah.
>> I think, I think there's a lot of clubs but I feel like not a lot of students are taking advantage of it.
They're just still doing their own thing and not really...
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>> Okay.
>>... I think because it's again, like at FCC where they're, I guess you know, what they want to do is not as
rigid, their department or their major is not really that strong, they're more open to it opposed to the
students that going to Fresno State, they're like that's not really a big a big deal and that's what I sort of
went through.
>> Okay. So this is the very last part and so we really want to increase the graduation rate, this is the bread
and butter, the key, you can name down the line what are the 20 things that you want at Fresno State to
increase graduation for not just Southeast Asians but Southeast Asian men, like all the things you want,
name it down the line.
>> I think the most important part is to develop an awareness, you know, I think that the classes that I
took, it helped me gain that and then because of that extra knowledge, it helped me go forward, I'd say
that. If I didn't, if I didn't take those classes, I wouldn't be as open-minded to you know, even for me to
conduct this interview, I would be somewhat you know, like...make a big deal.
>> You mean Asian American classes? What class? Asian American classes or what classes?
>> There was an Asian American studies class like the Asian, I can't remember the exact class...
>> 110 15 by Gena or Dr. Ng?
>> I took one with Dr. Ng, the communities...
>> Oh yeah, 110.
>> When I was at, do you know who John Choi is at FCC?
>> No.
>> Okay, he's probably one of my most influential teachers...
>> Oh.
>> Yeah, he's...
>> Okay, he was a...
>> Is he Korean?
>> He's Chinese.
>> Oh okay.
>> He's Chinese, he taught all the Asian American studies classes at FCC, he was also, say the Asian
American clubs advisor.
>> Oh okay.
>> He also had like a kung fu school and...
>> What!
>> He's very active...
>> Oh wow.
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>> Yeah, he is...
>> Holy Moly.
>> Yeah he is really, he's a very influential person in the community especially for a lot of the Asian students
that were going to FCC...
>> Really?
>> I'm pretty sure...
>> What is FCC? What is that?
>> Oh, Fresno City College.
>> Oh okay, I didn't really hear [laughter].
>> I think that the Asian studies, I guess the classes at Fresno City influenced me a lot...
>> Okay.
>> Because we also had Asian American...
>> So you want more of those classes.
>> Yeah if they were more, they'd helped me, it definitely open my, I guess, my pores of my just my ability
to I guess understand why things happen the way they do like patterns and whatever is happening within
our community, and I think that for my friends that went straight to Fresno State, they didn't really think
about Asian American classes at all. They were more like what I mentioned, how they have these things sort
of holding them back and they're blaming it on things like, you know, beings single, not having a good social
life opposed to me, I was more, I was exposed to those kind of you know, these numbers and that they
made a difference in how I looked at things and that if they were able to be exposed to that, those classes,
it wouldn't make them look at... It would make them I guess away a lot of the things that were sort of
holding them back a little bit and I think that having their confidence hold back a little bit is enough to stop
them from going forward.
>> Okay.
>> And I can say that for my friends that are still single and that they didn't graduate it's like together...
>> Wow, right, right.
>> It's like...
>> Okay
>>...Didn't graduate yet, they're still single and that they're still feeling like, they're blaming it on you know,
like the social aspect. But then I think that if they were a little bit more aware of the programs that they
have here, the clubs, and that were...Even if they were just you know, tried giving it a shot, maybe it will, it
will hopefully have them sit down in the class and maybe learn a little bit about it...
>> Okay.
>>... I think that one of the things that... Is Asian Studies, is that a GE class now?
>> Yes, it is a GE class.
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>> Okay, so I'm hoping that maybe is it not for upper division, just lower division or you know...
>> I think both... yeah, it's always filled.
>> I'm hoping that students are more I guess aware of those classes because they do make a big
difference. It makes us smarter of you know, what's happening within our community but also like ourselves
and seeing these patterns and that once we are aware of them, then we sort of do what we can to go
around it and that we do better. And instead of just letting those things hold them back, it's like they have
an excuse to not do well and I think that having a relatively unsuccessful social life definitely contributes to
it, it fights it.
>> Wow..Okay.
>> Yeah I would probably say like 9 out of 10 males blame it on something like that, they're like you know,
I didn't like school, I didn't think it was...
>> So you don't think it was some academic deficiency, it was a social deficiency [inaudible].
>> Yeah, I feel like it's a big part of it.
>> Wow, okay, that's interesting.
>> One thing that might be a factor is the idea that they chose a major they didn't like...
>> Okay.
>> Yeah, I have a friend that...
>> Based on their parents or just their own?
>> Yeah, I know that for a lot Filipinos, they want their kids to be engineers or writers...
>> Right, right, definitely, nurses and stuff
>>...Those are hard classes and so for me, I just wanted to graduate in the program that I can do well in
[laughter]. I didn't really go that route where I had to you know, take physics...
>> Right.
>>...Really hard classes and I think that it's because they were sort of expected to take those engineering
classes, those you know, medical terminology, they're not doing I guess what they're really passionate about
instead they're still like following what their parents want them to do...
>> Yeah, okay, great.
>> Yeah, I think it's definitely that, at least for Filipino people, they're still doing that, they're still like
following what their parents want them to do.
>> Okay, great.
>> Even if it's too hard, they'll still try to do it.
>> Okay...
>> Me, I'm like no, I'd rather just do what I'm good at.
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>> Okay, excellent, and that's actually it. Is there anything you'd like to add to the survey or interview? That
is it.
>> Yeah, I think I said a lot so...
>> Yes, thank you. Well, let me, thank you so much. I went for doing this interview, I'm going to turn it off
right now, so your comments are very valuable. Okay...
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